by Carolyn Miller

Created on: May 05, 2009   Last Updated: May 23, 2009

What is the most important thing parents can do for their children? Is it to keep them safe from harm? Is it to help them to feel good about themselves and life around them? Maybe it is to help them to be good students at school? While all of those are important, the most important responsibility parents have is to prepare their children to succeed without them.

As Steven Covey says, "Begin with the end in mind." If we know that in a little over twenty years, children need to be able to leave home equipped with the abilities and tools they need to go out and make a living for themselves and we raise our children with that in mind, then everything we do with or for our children will help with that end.

Success at school is a beginning, but does not assure a child will be able to succeed in the workplace. Who hasn't experienced working with someone who is habitually late, argues with others, does sloppy work or steals from the company? In study after study, employers have listed the traits they need in employees. The qualities they list fall under four headings. If your children can develop these qualities, they will be successful in their careers and in life.

Interpersonal Skills
Initiative
Ethics
Professionalism

Interpersonal Skills
Having good interpersonal skills requires a good attitude, good communication skills and being a team player. While some children naturally have some or all of these, most need to be taught these skills.

Saying no is one of the most basic and most important requirements of helping children to get along with others. One aspect of good interpersonal skills is a willingness to allow other people to have their way some of the time. Teaching children early that things cannot always go their way is critical to effective interpersonal skills.

Developing a great attitude takes effort. One way to help children learn about the importance of their attitude is to make an Attitude Chart. List all of the qualities you would like to reinforce like sharing, kind words, kind acts and doing what is asked. Use check marks or stickers to track attitude during the week and reward positive attitude. If it suits your family, you could also track poor attitude like talking back, yelling, name calling or hitting and subtract marks or points for those. Then offer a small reward when there are more positive attitudes than negative. Discuss and read books as a family about manners. Having good manners is really thinking about other people and their

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