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Trial By Greyhound

Tired of doing the same thing for Christmas, I suggested to my wife that we travel to Salt Lake City for the holidays. We had a place to stay there, so the cost would be minimal. She said it sounded like fun, but that we should keep it a secret from the kids. It would be a nice Christmas surprise.

So the planning began. Flying was the obvious choice, but would cost too much.

How about the train? Well, that would run $1200, from Portland to Utah via Sacramento...

That left the bus. Greyhound's price was only $488 round trip for the five of us, and if I hurried, I could beat the Christmas rush.

The bus. If memory served me correctly, they were well-heated, the seats soft, and the ride smooth. And since our family hadn't traveled on one before, it would be a new adventure. Something to talk about for years to come.

I purchased tickets around the first of November, the bus scheduled to leave from Portland at 12:50 PM on Friday, Dec 21, arriving in Salt Lake on Saturday, at 7:30 PM.

On Thursday morning I started feeing spacey and uncomfortable. By the time I got home from work, my worst fears were realized: I was sick with a cold.

Friday morning arrived. The kids were still guessing as we loaded our stuff into a neighbor's SUV, the light of understanding dawning on them only when we pulled into the terminal. While they didn't jump up and down with excitement, they were looking forward to seeing Salt Lake City at Christmas time.

Spaced out from a night-long battle with the chills, congestion and a low-grade fever, I was not jumping up and down either, my only goal for the day to crawl aboard the Grey dog and sleep the sleep of the dead.

We checked our baggage, then sat down near the boarding door. After about 15 minutes I noticed that a short line of five people was starting to form, so we dragged our bags to the back of the group.

After a few minutes, a stranger approached and decided to take cuts next to me, a few people already in line behind us.

"CL" (or "Crazed Loner", as I called him), began the conversation.

"I'm afraid I won't get anything to eat after we get on the bus."

"What do you mean?" I said.

"I haven't eaten in hours" C.L. said, pointing at some people at the front of the line. "They've already gotten something to eat and I haven't. I don't have any food."

I didn't know what to say.

"Where d'ya think the bus'll stop first?"

Again I had no answer.

"I hope I can get a seat on the bus before they're all gone."

He started moving forward in line to take

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