by Tom Geoffroy

Created on: May 03, 2009

Affection between a parent and child cannot be bought. It is cultivated over time and is thus given by each freely. The responsibility lies with the parent to sow seeds of unconditional love, caring, and affection in a child so the child will have the building blocks to use when building affectionate relationships in the future. It comes down to a simple ancient saying; "You reap what you sow" If you sow affection into your child; cultivate it with unconditional love, understanding, and compassion; you will reap an abundance of affection later.

Just like planting or sowing a field takes time before the crop is harvested, so too, sowing affection in your child will take time before you can expect a harvest of affection in return. An affectionate child will grow into an affectionate adult. Affection will be displayed based on love and caring. You will never have to bribe your child for their affection in the future. A parent attempting to buy affection from their child with expensive gifts is really dealing with a selfish spoiled child. Somewhere along the way, good parenting went bad. If you struggle with this, you can try the principals below to get back on track. You will have a more loving and satisfying relationship with your child and your child will grow into a loving affectionate adult.

1. Start early. When a child is born they are helpless and depend on us for everything. Moms and Dads shower love and affection on their new child because they love them very much. The child may never respond to this affection but that should not stop the parent from continuing to be affectionate. Just holding a child, kissing them, and speaking and singing to them shows affectionate love.

2. As the child grows and starts to explore their new world, they are bound to get into things they should not. Again, this is a time when parents can show affection even as they begin to give them guidance and direction towards good behavior. Being affectionate does not mean we do not discipline. We discipline because we love them.

3. Spending time with your child builds a bond which is hard to break. The amount of time you spend with your child is an investment in their future. They will learn from you, and pick up queues of how to express love, affection, and kindness. Your child may come up to you for no reason and just hug and kiss you. These are affectionate signs they have probably picked up from you. You, in turn, will respond to their acts of affection with affection and love for

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