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While our children are supposed to be our greatest resource for the future, it seems many have forgotten this or just don't care. Part of appreciating a resource is to nurture it and build the character of that resource. I suspect very few parents would say they don't love their children and yet I wonder if they hear the words that come out of their mouths.

Is it okay to call children names? Well there are several different ways a child might be called a name. So let's address a scenario or two.. First is the nick name or pet name that may be used by a parent or other family member or friend. When I was young I was called "Pot Head" by my father. It didn't bother me until I got older and more aware I had also seen a picture of myself playing in a toilet and decided that this was why my father called me "Pot Head". I assumed that from the name everyone would know my history of playing in toilets and became quite embarrassed by the nick name. Fortunately when I was about ten or eleven, the term became used for those who smoked pot, which was far more effective then my pleading to get my father to stop calling me "Pot Head". Only later did I learn that he had actually gotten the nick name from the " Lil Abner" comic strip, where there was a character who wore a pot on his head and was called "Pot Head". Seems I had also been guilty of putting pot's on my head as a young child.

I gave my own children nick names or had family members do so. I will never forget the reaction I got when a co-worker heard me refer to my third son as "Turkey Butt". She thought it was horrible and carried on so much that I gave it a great deal of thought. I knew the embarrassment, my own nick name had caused and I really didn't want to do that to my own children. I decided to poll my children who ranged from 2 to 12. My oldest stalled a bit before admitting being called by his nick name made him feel warm inside. My second son was suspicious of being asked and wanted to know why I was asking, so I explained. He told me that my co-worker was full of it. Then I got to my youngest and I struggled with how to ask him, since he was so young. I asked him "Is being a Turkey Butt a good thing or a bad thing?" He beamed from ear to ear and said "I, a good boy!" With that I figured my co-worker was indeed full of it and that children know when they are being addressed in an affectionate and loving way.

Then there is the actual name calling. I was four the first time I was called a "B!+ch" by my first

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