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experiences. That does not, however, always translate into being experiences that are most likely to contribute to a sense of sureness and security.

Sureness and a sense of security come from those quieter, surer, calmer, interactions between parent (usually mother) and baby. A sense of security comes, too, from knowing that Mommy is always there to respond to needs and distress. For a baby, a sense of security also comes from having his needs met and from experiencing a caretaker's calming, gentle, touch and voice. Until a child has grown enough not to experience some of the more active parts of some days as frazzling, it's important that he experience enough time feeling super-secure and super-safe to balance off some of the more frazzling times in his day.

In general, most of cannot make the leap from feeling anxious to being asleep without having some time in-between to bridge the gap. Some adults may simply stay up until they're ready to "pass out", but that doesn't work for babies. Babies get over-tired, which means they get yet more distressed. Feeling yet more distressed means they feel that much less safe and secure. Even when a baby has been over-tired and distressed, once he does "pass out" he is likely to have a fitful sleep and wake during the night.

Babies who feel safe and secure are babies who are generally happier babies, who are also easier to care for in general. They're usually happy with whatever is going on, and being putting in their crib for the night can just seem like one more pleasant part of their day. Some secure babies will have those frazzling days that make them feel a little less secure for a brief time. Some babies, however, will live all their days feeling a little anxious because some parents may not be quite as skilled as others at helping their baby feel safe and secure. Essentially, whether a baby feels a little less secure on a particularly frazzling day or is a child who lives feeling a little less secure, the root of the problem is that when any of us is anxious our brain chemicals change in a way that is not conducive to getting a good night's sleep. To make the problem worse, a baby who does not get the right amount of the right quality sleep will begin the following day at a disadvantage, when it comes to feeling safe and secure.

When it comes down to it, babies require very little in this world. With the exception of getting their nutrition, the need to feel safe and secure is the most crucial need any baby has. When such an important need is overlooked, or when parents are not skilled in meeting that need, that is certainly a problem big enough for anyone to lose sleep over.

Learn more about this author, Lisa H Warren.
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