by Mike Mccarthy

Created on: April 28, 2009   Last Updated: April 29, 2009

So there you are, sitting at a table in a restaurant facing the date of your dreams, and you are both sitting in an embarrassing silence. You feel it is all going wrong and you wish you were somewhere else. Had you planned some first date conversation starters, then the situation would most likely be different.

To have got to this first date, one assumes that it must have been arranged prior to the meeting. You must have planned where you were going to meet and at what time. Did you plan any more than that? If not, it suggests you were leaving the rest of the date to fate.

Lets presume that you were the instigator of this date, and that the person you have asked is someone you really want to be with. Some awkwardness during the date is to be expected, even if you know the person you have asked out quite well, as the formality of an actual date washes away any daily familiarity you may have with this person. So, plan what you will do during the date beforehand.

This planning involves amongst other things, what you will say during the date. Those few conversation starters that will fill those embarrassing voids once you have covered the weather and how nice each other looks. Hopefully you will know a little about the person you are dating, perhaps their interests or what sports they are involved in, these are conversation starters.

A good little game to play is the questions game. Ask your date to compile five questions that they will ask you, about yourself during the date. Ask them to compile these questions before the date itself. You can do the same, listing five questions you will ask the other person.

It may be, that conversation goes well during the date and the questions will not be needed, but, should silence prevail, then simply ask the other to start with their first question. Make this fun, emphasize the fact that it is a game. Keep it light and you will both enjoy it. You will also get pointers from the other person about what they want from you by the nature of their questions, which is of course a bonus.

Take turns with the questions, if you have been clever, your questions although light will also tell you more about the person you are dating. With a little luck and personality, it is quite likely that not all the questions will be needed, as earlier questions will lead to normal conversation, but the remaining questions are there for future silences.

As a way of starting and continuing conversation during a first date, the question game does work. If you are a person that has first dates on a regular basis, you can hone this system until it works well for you every time.

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