by Kevin Dorning

Created on: April 28, 2009

Do you think about it?
Death I mean.

Yes, every day.

Every day?

Yes, every day. In fact, multiple times every day.

Why do you suppose that is?

I'm getting older you know.
Perhaps it's because I'm tired.

Tired? Tired of what?

Oh, I don't know.
Breathing, dealing with conflict, trying to satisfy.

Hm. Hm. -
I'll have to think about that.
It's not like wanting to die you know.

But sometimes, Well, sometimes the burdens get so heavy that I think how nice it would be of they were just over.

Maybe I'm tired of that too.
Of thinking, I mean. It does become burdensome at times.

What do you want to do?

There are so many things.
To sit on a hillside overlooking the ocean and smell the oil in the dust after a summer rain.

To watch the clouds in the blue sky and imagine what they look like.

Listen to the waves rumble and hiss.

Feel the wind in my face.

Smell the salt in the air.

Smoke and enjoy it without feeling guilty

Drink a pint of ale and laugh with simple friends

Walk in the woods - Stroll, not hike

Listen to the birds and squirrels

Ride a bike because it's fun

Listen to the radio in Spanish without caring that I can't understand it

Feel the sun on my face

Feel the chill of a spring morning

Smell the fresh cut grass on the breeze

Open the screen door, and let it slam

Share a sunset with someone who feels it like I do and doesn't have to talk about it

Enjoy plain old food

Not care about money

Live a day without electronics

Watch the dry grass blow in the wind

Smell burning leaves

Not have to be responsible for other peoples well being

To be able to pray without wondering if anyone is listening

Not be the expert

Have a simple conversation about simple things

Watch seagulls float on the wind

Hear the wind through the trees

Smile

Spend a day without feeling like crying

Not have to worry about what other people think

To be able to do something for someone else without their knowing about it

Breath a free breath

Not think about every day as if it were money

Eat fried chicken and be happy about it

There are just so many things.

It's hard to make it clear.
If you don't understand it without an explanation then you never will, and if you do understand it, you probably want the same things.

How do you describe the pleasure of sitting in the dirt with your back to a boulder in the sun, watching the birds fly over the ocean. How do you make someone understand the feeling of cool wind blowing your hair all over the place.

How can you explain the feeling of awe when you hear thunder roll across the sky.

If someone doesn't feel drawn to it, how can you make the sound or rain have any meaning at all.

There are so many things!

So why don't you?

Because there are so many cares. And because other people get in the way.

You should you know.

I know. Perhaps I will. Maybe just a little at a time.

Like sipping good wine?

Yes, Like that.

I think I will start with a nice cup of coffee, With whipped cream and cinnamon.

Like we used to do?

Yes like we used to do.

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