by John G Thomas

Created on: April 27, 2009

The park bench is hard and uncomfortable on my old bones as I sit and stare out across the lake. My legs are not what they used to be and I have to shift every little while to stop them from getting uncomfortable. It is a beautiful summers day and the bright warm sun feels good on my face. The smell of fresh grass and blossoming trees fills my nostrils as I steadily drink it in.

A young couple walk hand in hand past the bench smiling and chatting. Young love. They look at me and smile slightly before turning back to each other. I remember being that age. Walking in this very park. It is hard to believe but I was their age once. Young and carefree with my future ahead of me and the world at my fingertips. I wonder if they realise how quickly life can pass by. My life passes through my mind like a flicker book. Still shots and images all mixed together. I sometimes wish it were possible to remember all the moments of my life. All the small details. I'm not getting any younger and my mind isn't what it used to be and I accept that.

The young couple have stopped to throw bread to the ducks and the girl starts to scream and giggle as a passing swan decides it wants some bread too and starts to flap its wings at the ducks. It makes me smile. A young mother walks past pushing a toddler in a pushchair and she to smiles at me on the way past. She probably feels sorry for me sitting here on my own. I do not mind though. It gives me time to reflect on my life and the things I have done, the places I have been and the people I have met. I sometimes wonder what my childhood friends are doing right now and what they did with their lives. I even wonder if they are still alive.

The birds in the trees are singing happily and I watch as a squirrel darts between the trees and scrambles about. Suddenly a second squirrel appears and they chase each around the treetop playfully running back and forth. I like coming to this bench. Sitting here on a warm sunny day lets time tick by slowly. There is no need for me to rush anymore. I'm an old man and time is a gift to be savoured and enjoyed. If only I could tell every young person I met how short life actually is. I was young once and never believed that so why would they. A smile slightly and decide that maybe that is one of life's lessons that we all have to learn for ourselves.

I must have been sat here for hours as the bright sunny day is beginning to fade. I stand slowly, letting my feet gradually take my weight. I stand for a moment and take another deep breath of summer evening. I can smell a barbecue cooking near by and hear laughter of young people enjoying themselves. I wish I could tell them to cherish these moments. It is time for me to head back home now. I think I will have sandwiches for tea.

I turn and take one last look at the bench and smile at the name written on it. I take the sleeve of my jacket and carefully leaning over, polish the brass plaque. Her name is still engraved on my heart, as it is this bench. I gently kiss my wrinkled hand and press it softly onto the cold brass. I will be back soon. I turn to walk away and for a brief second hear her voice in the gentle summer evening breeze. I have had a good life and was lucky to share it with someone so special. I miss her greatly and think about her every day. I still sometimes forget that she is gone and mistakenly call her name when I'm home on my own. Sometimes I still even have conversations with her and call good night before I turn of the light to go to sleep.

I start to walk across the grass to the gate and smile at the thought of her walking next to me.

I have had a good life.

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