Channel Button

There are 90 articles on this title. You are reading the article ranked and rated #3 by Helium's members.

Arts & Humanities   >

Arts & Humanities (Other)

Get a Widget for this title

10 things you can do in the library that will really annoy the other patrons

Think before you act. Annoying behavior in a library is child's play but the object is to annoy without being turned out on your ear and possibly having your library card taken away. Then where would you go on a rainy day when you are bored?

So stop and think. What annoys you when you are in the library? If it annoys you, it is virtually guaranteed that it annoys others. Use that knowledge and many hours of annoyance can begin.

1 - Sh! - It is a cliche. Someone rustles a newspaper or drops a book and the librarian stares over her steel-rimmed glasses, puts a finger to her lips and utters "Sh", usually accompanied by a hard stare. The same tactic can be employed by the dedicated library annoyance.

Idly stroll the aisles, ostensibly perusing the books whilst looking for librarians. Be close when one is replacing books on shelves. As the librarian replaces a book on the shelf, no matter how slight the sound of that action, give them a hard stare and a sharp 'sh'. Confusion and surprise will prevent them reacting before you casually stroll off to another aisle.

Walk past the help desk whilst a librarian is aiding a patron. As she quietly explains some detail to her customer repeat the stare and "sh" maneuver. Be sure to walk slowly, as after their initial surprise they are likely to continue talking, thus giving you the opportunity for a second, louder stare and sh.

Opportunities to annoy librarians are endless. You will soon discover your own.

2 - Come fly with me - This takes a little preparation, but is worth the effort. Most libraries have a section where you can read local and national papers and magazines. (If yours doesn't, simply take your own). Before you leave home prepare several paper planes and slip them into your pocket or inside a folded newspaper.

Upon reaching the library, spend some time wandering the shelves. As you reach to pull down a book place a paper plane towards the back of the books facing towards the other side. Note - this only works on the double faced shelves although it can be done with some stealth by placing the planes on the top of stacks). Keep moving.

Once all your planes are in position, return to the beginning. When you see someone coming along the other side of the shelves, quickly flick the plane off of the shelf into their path. Distracted by the plane, they will not notice you disappearing towards your next target.

You can take a break and sit innocently reading a book or perusing the noticeboard or continue straight on to the


Below are the top articles rated and ranked by Helium members on:

10 things you can do in the library that will really annoy the other patrons

  • 1 of 90

    by Wendy Brock

    You can legally annoy library patrons without getting thrown out! The secret is in one word: subtlety. If you have a penchant

    read more

  • 2 of 90

    by James Mockridge.

    A library is a savored and hallowed institution within which certain unwritten laws and etiquette are expected to be observed

    read more

  • 3 of 90

    by Gillian Taber

    Think before you act. Annoying behavior in a library is child's play but the object is to annoy without being turned out

    read more

  • 4 of 90

    by Casey Creveling

    1. Make a lot of noise
    Push books off shelves "accidentally" and chew gum and blow bubbles. Also talk to yourself REALLY loudly
    2.

    read more

  • 5 of 90

    by Caroline Tigeress

    1 Flatulence, of course, your first and foremost powerful weapon in the annoying persons game. A good healthy lunch of chili

    read more

View All Articles on:
10 things you can do in the library that will really annoy the other patrons

Add your voice

Know something about 10 things you can do in the library that will really annoy the other patrons?
We want to hear your view. Write_penWrite now!

Helium Debate

Cast your vote!

Are standing ovations becoming overused by theater audiences?

Click for your side.

87026

Featured Partner

Breakthrough

Breakthrough has partnered with Helium, giving you the chance to write for a cause. Browse Breakthrough's featur...more

What is Helium? | Buy Web Content | Contact Us | Privacy | User agreement | DMCA | User Tools | Help | Community | Helium’s Official Blog | Link to Helium

Helium, Inc.
200 Brickstone Square Andover, MA 01810 USA