by ArtiSiN

Created on: April 24, 2009   Last Updated: October 08, 2009

"Watch out for the guy in the bubble shield, he's got a shotgun!" screams your teammate, a little too loudly into your ear piece. But with the score tied 49-49, and one more death yielding the game to the blue team, his dramatized shouts are warranted. But just as you're about to empty a family of needler rounds into "HaloGod67", a voice from behind you exasperatingly says, "Can you turn that down? I'm tryingto read!" And just like that, it's game over for you. The distracting remark that caused your team the game came from your ever-so-pissed girlfriend. It seems for the diehard gamer who refuses to "grow up" such ignorant pleas are all too familiar. Despite your video gaming hobby earning the horrible ire of non-gamer girlfriends, a true gamer never gives up until he's won the last fight, played through it again on the hardest difficulty, and collected all of the achievements. If left untouched, the situation reaches its boiling point and the dreaded ultimatum is presented: "It's either the Xbox or me" she says. How did it get to this point? But more importantly how can this be resolved?

Everything was fine when you first met her - movies, dinner, and great sex. But soon the novelty of the new relationship wears off, and with it comes off the masks we wear to lure one another in under false pretenses (if you take that literally - seek help). Eventually the movies become fewer and farther in between, the dinners become repetitive and stale, and the great sex is replaced with a few seizure-like seconds of "thanks for trying". She finally sees you in your authentic form, as you now see her. Forget Sephiroth, Liquid Snake, or even Bowser - she's worse than any digital antagonist you've ever encountered. To her, your gaming reflects a childish inability to cope with the pressures of the real world, and poses a threat to her position in your life. To you, her incessant nagging and threatening over your gaming makes her take on the form of an unholy, authoritarian Nazi vampire, who won't rest until your entire video game collection is annihilated!

However, this cruel ultimatum she presents not only will NOT solve the problem, but will create new problems. First, it reveals her as wanting to change YOU to better fit HER needs. And second, it shows her lack of enthusiasm to truly get to know you through a huge aspect of your life. In spite of this, it is crucial that you do not counter this with the "fight fire with fire" mentality. Don't believe me? Go 'head and

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