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When young or middle-aged persons decide to take the plunge again, or for the first time, we congratulate them, wish them well, and return to our busy lives. However, when an individual is 65+, we often feel justified in examining the relationship, passing judgment and, in some cases, even protesting that their age is an impediment.

By the time most of us reach "old-age" we could possibly have been married, once or several times, raised a family and, sadly, buried a beloved companion. A small percentage of the older population has remained single their entire life, claiming they did not meet the "right person."

Widows and widowers, confirmed bachelors, and single older females are common in our society and we marvel at how well they cope, "on their own.". Should one of them declare, at an advanced age, that they are contemplating marriage, we collectively say "Aww, isn't that cute." and then reflect critically on whether they are "too old."

One is never too old to crave companionship, friendship and a committed partnership; all benefits of marriage. Romance has no age limits. So when is an individual "too old" to contemplate taking that life-changing step?

The answer lies in an honest appraisal of the advantages and drawbacks to marrying at an older age:

Advantages of marriage at an older age

* Married couples live longer due to the health benefits garnered from sharing the stresses of life with another individual.

* Impetus to take care of oneself is increased and medical concerns are prudently addressed.

* Risks of loneliness and depression are mitigated.

* There is peace of mind in knowing someone will "be there" potentially for the rest of life.

* Material comforts increase by combining incomes and assets.

Disadvantages of marriage at an older age

* Adult children could be unhappy or suspicious of motives and stress could compound.

* Living arrangements might present a problem if both parties are not living independently from their families.

* Wills, powers of attorney, and medical directives might have to be revised to accommodate the change of status. Estates need to be designated to the children from the marriage when the assets were accumulated, rather than the new elderly spouse.

If the disadvantages can be discussed openly and honestly with a level of comfort, chances are the disadvantages will evaporate with common sense solutions.

If an elderly couple are in good health, living independently and committed to one another in an equal and loving partnership then "too old" is not part of the equation and marriage can be a fulfilling and logical higher level of commitment.

Learn more about this author, Carol Gioia.
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