by Terry Marsh

Created on: April 21, 2009

"I want a divorce." The words can hit like a Louisville Slugger. There are other ways that it can be said which softens the blow, but the impact feels the same. When the person you love wants to move on without you, the blow can be devastating.

With national divorce rates now topping 50 percent in the United States, the averages are no longer favor marriages lasting "till death do us part". Couples today include golden parachutes in the form of pre-nuptial agreements as a part of the wedding preparations. Before their lives together get started, they are already looking for a way out.

Divorce touches the lives of people outside of the separating couple. Family, friends, and most of all, children are also affected when a marriage ends. Unwanted divorces can lead to emotionally draining battles that in some cases go on for years, and there is a greater need for healing when children are involved. How do you emotionally survive a divorce when you didn't want one in the first place?

Family and Friends

Family members are a good source of emotional support regardless of the tragedy. When dealing with divorce, there is a good chance that another family member has gone through the experience who can suggest ways to best move forward. Being in the presence of family members can also be comforting. Family members are familiar, and sometimes, just being in their presence can ease discomfort.

Like family members, good friends can provide the comfort of familiarity. The best friends know when to talk, when to listen, and when to just be available for a shoulder to cry on. Also, like some family members, many of them have experienced the pain of divorce and can give suggestions on how to get through the time of discomfort.

Support Groups

Divorce support groups can be found in virtually every area in the country. Some people prefer gender specific groups, while others prefer mixed gender groups. Some are more comfortable blending into larger groups, while smaller groups are a better fit for others. It is a good idea to visit a few group meetings to determine what feels most comfortable.

Several national and international divorce support groups offer chapters in most cities. Groups such as Parents Without Partners has chapters and affiliates in most cities to help facilitate divorce and grief recovery. Most organizations also provide children grief recovery as well. Divorcemag.com is a great resource to begin searching for support in any area.

Spiritual Support

Some people find that

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