When we think of extended families, we think of men and or women who are divorced and with kids meeting each other creating a relationship and forming one family from the two families. This is the typical 'Extended Family'.

But hark, there is at least one other meaning to the 'Extended Family'.

Lets say for the sake of interest that a daughter who is divorced with 3 children,(lets say 2 teens, and a almost teen) moved into her parents home. Now that could be a disaster. It could also be a very good situation. It's all in how you work at it. The parents can help her with the kids and financially. She helps out with the work around the house and what have you. The parents and the daughter, all help each other with lots of love and moral support. That would be great.

Consider this; the kids can learn stuff about earlier times in life from the old folks and the old folks can learn how to except and handle the younger generation, not to mention the fact that the grandparents get to watch the grand-kids grow up. What could be greater than that? After all things change so fast we need all the help we can get from all sides.

The daughter has the moral support from the parents with raising the kids. But she also has some freedom to have a personal life without the worry of how the kids are being care for or what they are up to. Peace of mine is a wonderful thing.

This extended family has lives together and they also have lives separate to each other. The together times give the grandparents and parents the time, that is so dear, to watch them grow and be a part of the growing. The separate time allows them the space to grow as individuals. But they still have a safety net there.

There can be draw backs to this sort of arrangement. After all, aside from sharing the same household as one big happy family, they are, in fact, two separate families. That is something easily forgotten, especially when the daughter was raised by the parents and is now a parent of her own. The parents can forget from time to time that they don't have all the reins in hand anymore. That daughter is all grown up and is now in the control booth for her own kids. That can be particularly hard on the Mother parent because she isn't the 'Mom' any more. She isn't the 'one' in charge of everything any more. That she has to step aside and let the daughter be the 'Mom' now. She is all grown up and not that little girl any more. That takes work on both parts and can be solved with patience and understanding.

To the end of this train of thought, the believe that this definition for 'Extended Families' is a good one and could work for all, if we live and let live. If we all understand that we are family, blood of blood and still individuals of our own right. Helping, loving, sharing, and letting go is all a part of life as family. Families that extended into larger families and never stop as life goes on and on and on.

Learn more about this author, Jan Powell.
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