by M.A. Dal Cero

Created on: April 18, 2009

Grief is an emotion that does not limit itself in any way. It does not discriminate, and no one is immune or protected against it's existence. People tend to associate grief purely with the feelings that occur following the death of a loved one, or the loss of a spouse through divorce. However, grief can show up in unexpected places in our lives where would would not expect to encounter it.

Loss is a constant occurrence in the life of a human being, and it is most noticeable when we move forward on the journey from childhood into adulthood. We often lose our innocence and child-like naivete through the experience of life's harsh realities. The moment when we begin to realize that the world is sometimes a cruel and unjust place is, for some of us, the starting point of grief. We grieve for the simplicity of life as we knew it, and become increasingly aware that we will feel pain, loss, and sadness throughout the course of our days here on earth.

Grief also arrives as we grow further into old age. Our bodies may start to fail us, and our mental and physical capacities may weaken. The loss of youth, young adulthood, and even middle age can bring forth feelings of grief for times of life that will never return to us. Further, the realization that death is closer than we would like to believe can be an emotional shock to our systems, and a reality that can no longer be avoided or ignored.

Perhaps one of the saddest losses we may be forced to grieve during our lifetimes is that of our hopes and dreams. We are brought up to aspire to reach all of our goals and fulfill all of our desires. However, the point in time may arrive where we have to face the fact that certain dreams were simply not meant to be. It may be that we wished for children, but were unable to conceive. Perhaps we hoped for a happy, long-lasting marriage, but were unable to find a soul-mate and never married at all. Maybe we longed to fulfill our desire to be a successful artist, singer, or dancer, but those aims never came to fruition. The list of broken dreams is virtually endless, yet those are the very dreams that were once so important to us, and they deserve to be grieved over.

Grieving life's many and varied losses is a normal and natural part of what it means to be human. We cannot deter grief, for it can and will visit us many times masked in different disguises. The most that we can do is to accept grief's inevitability, and learn how to deal with it's effects in the healthiest and most appropriate ways.

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