by Deborah Nies

Created on: April 17, 2009

Parenting Unplugged

My #1 tip for raising successful children is be there, be present, accounted for, and be your child's biggest cheerleader during their childhood. Nothing more says "I love you" to a child, than to be physically present every day.

I was reminded of this when I was sitting at my daughter's piano lesson this week. I observed the following dad and son "interaction." Not once in this half hour time slot did they speak to one another. Each was engaged in his own electronic world.

Wired In but Checked Out

Dad and Son sitting side by side.
Dad punches keys on his laptop in a zombie-like hypnosis.
Son shoots bad guys on his Game Boy. *Bang*Pow*Stuff blows up*
Father-Son Bonding...
in the Electronic Age.
WI FI...I say WHY FI?
and I wonder, Why Parent?

Our ever-present, instant, 24/7 shiny gadgets, gives us so many more ways to ignore our children. We are living in a world of constant connectedness. Yet, we have never been more disconnected personally from our loved ones. We are constantly texting, IM'ing, gaming, downloading, emailing, phoning, surfing...Are we really connecting to other humans though? I would answer "no."

And, today are children are plugged in, too! Unfortunately, my daughter was just introduced to the addictive WebKinz world. On the surface, WebKinz toys appear to be innocuous cute stuffed animals. However, I have found them to be the most addictive form of electronic crack to ever be marketed to children.

After the child enters the secret tag code on the Webkinz website, he/she is now expected to daily keep their pet happy, fed and loved. Every day, my daughter feels compelled to log on to the site to make sure that her pet hasn't died. Of course, there are also games to play, things to buy for your pet, etc. I have found that I need to limit her computer time to 30 minutes per day, or she would be clicking away for hours. Argh, she has been sucked into the Internet whirlpool. Want a successful child? Unplug them, unplug yourself, and reconnect.

Today, a friend of mine confided that she and her son recently discussed the best and worst parts of their day. He told her, "The worst part of my day is that you spent an hour on the telephone." She was saddened by his response, and was determined to make a point of really being "there" during family time in the future. Missed phone calls can be returned after bedtime. Good bonding time with our children cannot be retrieved from the sand slipping through the hourglass.

I admit it. My computer calls to

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