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Changing your spouse's behavior

by Amela Piric

Created on: April 17, 2009   Last Updated: June 03, 2009

How many times have you tried to tell your spouse that you need to be loved emotionally during the day if he wants you to enter wholeheartedly into intimacy with him? It is quite possible that your spouse enters a marriage with such a low level of knowledge and skills to meet your needs. In that case it is essential that you teach your spouse what your needs and feelings are and show him how he can meet those needs. He can then become far more receptive to learning about your needs and how he can fulfill them.

When you were in school, you may have noticed that some courses were much more enjoyable than others simply because they were taught by the professor you liked. You'll agree that it was easier and more enjoyable to learn from teachers who possessed certain character qualities.

In the same manner, you must show certain character qualities that will make your husband want to learn more about your needs and be more receptive to your feelings. Then it would be easier for him or her to respond to your needs and feelings. If your character qualities are nourished, they will grow stronger and have a greater influence on your personality. As this growth takes place, your husband will have a much greater desire to learn how to love you in the way you need to be loved.

You must possess some of the qualities listed below in some degree before your spouse will really want to learn from you.

1. Exemplify courage.

Many women abandoned their hope that their marriage will ever improve. As soon as woman's hope for a better marriage fades, her attractiveness to her husband automatically decreases and the life of the relationship gradually dies. Regardless of how discouraged you may be, it is never too late to instill hope and bring renewed life into your marriage.

2. Use your greatest strength to detect praiseworthy qualities in your spouse.

Use gratefulness to motivate your husband. Gratefulness expressed through praise is one of the highest motivations for men. If you want your relationship with your husband to become more fulfilling, it is essential that you develop a grateful attitude.

3. Lead by example

When the qualities of courage, persistence, gratefulness, calmness, gentleness, and unselfish love are present in a person's character, it is easier to receive his or her words and to follow his or her advice or example. This is no less true for your marriage.

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