by Bobbie Smith

Created on: April 14, 2009

The hardest part about finding true love is opening yourself to the potential. The good news is: this is something you can control. Finding that someone who is willing to build true love with only you, and is compatible and committed enough to sustain it with you can be challenging, admittedly, but it's only possible when your heart and mind are open.

Are you unknowingly pushing true love away? Let's consider a few reasons why it is possible you could be unwittingly repelling the potential for true love in your life:

1. Your Body Is Speaking without your permission. Maybe you are unknowingly sending a signal or message to the world that is keeping some people away - you look away too soon, you have your arms folded at parties, you look disgruntled because 'there is no one left'. Our bodies give us away even when we don't know it. They tell on us at work, at play and at home. Actions do speak louder than words, and so does body language. It's important to relax your mind and your body through regular self care, such as pampering, massage, meditation, reading, writing in a journal or doing what you love, so you can embrace the potential that may be standing right beside you.

2. Cynicism has become a defense mechanism. Assuming you are no longer 15 and are reading an article about why true love is hard to find, you have probably been in love and been burned in the past. Every time you get burned, you develop emotional debt, especially if you don't deal with your issues. When separating from relationships, especially complicated ones, you can't always address every single issue before parting. Emotional debt is the baggage that remains when you go through an emotionally painful experience and do not deal with the issues directly to resolve your pain. To read more about emotional debt and the impact it can have on your life, read David Viscott's book on Emotional Resilience.

3. Fear of success or of failure. The expression, 'be careful what you wish for' is real because many people are afraid to be happy and successful. Fear exists because it is an unknown state of existence. And, while happiness and success are full of hope and opportunity, the fact that you're not sure about it may just be enough to keep you away. Or, perhaps you're on the other side of the spectrum: you're afraid of failing - of getting into a relationship 'once again' that will just add to your spectacular track record. The only way to avoid both of these fears is to admit you have them and do it

• 1
• 2
• Next Page >>