by Wonda Waide

Created on: April 13, 2009

I know all kids backtalk because I was one of the best ones doing it when I was a kid. My mother always told me when I had kids I would understand well she also said I hope their worse then you. I always laughed at that and still it gives me a chuckle after having 3 kids I still have not got one worse. But I do have 2 that back talk one who is three and tells me im not the boss of her and a ten yr old who back talks in a joking but disrespectful way so he can try and slide by with I was just joking.

I sometimes over react to my children's talking because I am human and it's not the back talk so much as the disrespect. That may sound funny to some since back talk is a way of disrespect. My mother taught me when I was young the difference just as adults need to vent children need the same escape. So as long as it's venting and unequivocal disapproving statement in tongue lashing its not back talk.
When my son does it he is always had something wrong and before I over react I always make sure I ask what happened at school today and he will most likely talk to me about all that is bothering him. I always ask everyday after school how was his day and he says fine. Later when we are discussing his disrespect, he is talking about how he had a bad day. I do not understand why he cannot just tell me upfront but I try to be understanding to the day he may have had.
My daughter on the other hand has a good tongue-lashing with her father. She doesn't disrespect me as bad as her father. However, she is three. When she says things I no she had to learn from other kids I try to sit and explain everything to her.
Nevertheless, I know I need venting in my life or I would have bad days every day at everyone and that would be no good. Some back talking has to be let go for kids need to be heard. The disrespect always needs an explanation or they will continue it. My children make mistakes. We all need a lending ear and not that a child will ever not talk back. If my children did not I would wonder what's wrong with them because all kids do it they need to have a release some how. Im an adult I know how to vent children do not know how yet but they need to express all emotions as parents we need to be able to know the difference and teach them so they know the difference when they become adults.
We as parents need to teach our kids the difference between disrespect and back talking and the level their allowed. I was when I was kid and I am going to pass the same to my children. I am one parent that the children do not disrespect me nor give me any problems.

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