by Robert Lambert

Created on: April 12, 2009

If you ask the average gay man or lesbian this question, you are likely to receive a forceful "no!" in addition to a stern lecture on why being gay couldn't possibly be a choice. I fully understand the reason for this passion and I don't exactly disagree, but I believe that it's misguided.

Consider for a moment: why does it matter whether being gay is a choice, rather than being the result of biology and/or psychology? Well, to those who wish to change gay people, they want to believe that it's a choice so they can make you choose otherwise. But to us, why does it matter? If it's biological, then it's simply a fact of my life that I have to deal with, good or bad. If it's a choice, then it's my choice and no one else has much reason to care about it. Gay people in general seem to have the impression that if it were a choice, it would somehow be less valid. But the whole argument is based around the assumption that being gay is immoral and undesireable, that if someone had a choice they ought to choose to be straight. If being gay is okay, then biology and choice are both fine reasons to do it.

To a certain extent, I think those who believe it is a choice and those who believe it's not are using different definitions of "being gay." Those who argue that it is a choice are talking about homosexual behavior and identification, whereas those who believe it's not a choice are talking about homosexual orientation or attraction. It's perfectly clear that dating and having sex with a member of the same sex is a choice, whereas mounting evidence suggests that orientation is biological. However, I wonder if gay activists are correct in touting orientation as the most important factor. Yes, it's true that without that orientation we would have almost certainly never chosen to engage in homosexual behavior, but do we really want to categorize people by their biology rather than by choice? I believe that the fact that a person chooses to stand up and say "I'm gay" defines them more than the fact that they have certain genes.

I think it's also important to consider those who don't identify as the gay rights movement would like them to. People who have homosexual attraction but choose not to identify or behave as gay have, in the eyes of the gay community, made the wrong choice. We say they're "really" gay and just "think" they're straight, as if our opinion should have more weight than theirs in regards to their own identity. I agree that they're making a mistake and that they'll

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