by Kasee Stringer

Created on: April 10, 2009

OK, so I've been the bitter single girl. I've been the girl who claims she does not "want or need" a man, yet has been painstakingly jealous of all of her friends who now have wonderful relationships. Friends who are no longer available to hang out at the spur of the moment. Ladies get over it. Bitter will get you nothing but one thing: alone. No man wants a woman who is unhappy all of the time and bitter about past relationships. Just as you do not want to be held liable for the mistakes of past women, men do not want to be the punching bag for your emotional traumas.

The past is just that, the past. You cannot change it. So no matter what you say or do, what's done is done. I realize that sometimes things happen in relationships and it bruises your heart (not to mention your ego), but it does not really break it. Time heals all wounds, and if you're still holding on to something that happened five years ago, you may need to take a good look in the mirror and find out why you are still holding on to this memory.

Being single is really not the end of the world. I used to think it was. Then it hit me. I get to go out whenever I choose. I answer to no one, and I come and go as I please. If I want to lay in bed and read a book all day, there is no one to stop me. Except maybe the dog who needs to go out once in a while. If I want to take a pottery, sewing, cooking, or salsa class, there is no one to ask me, "What are you doing that for?" If I want to go spend money on new clothes, there is no one to complain about the credit card bill.

I mean really. Think of all the dating and fun you could be having along the way until you meet Mr. Right? There is nothing wrong with going to dinner, a movie or out dancing. Instead, you want to sit on the couch every Saturday watching sappy chic flicks mad at the world because your best friend is having date night with her husband. That is no way to live!

I know that in the end real love is what most people, men and women both, long for. And if it's what you truly want? Stop looking. Take time out for yourself to improve on you. Take time to make sure you are on your A game. Go get a facial, a pedicure, your hair done, whatever.

The bottom line is this. People do not need another person to complete them. Happiness comes from within. You must love yourself first. (yes, I sound like a Dr. Phil book.) But it really is the truth. You are bitter and single because you are giving off the vibe that you are unapproachable. When you walk with your head held high and a smile on your face, one day a man is going to notice that. He is going to see the confident, sexy woman you are, and want to get to know you. So until that day comes, go out and have some fun!

Learn more about this author, Kasee Stringer.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.