by Matt Bird

Created on: April 08, 2009

Some green on the walls

A lamp in the halls

Draped in flannel shawls

Will make my house the best of all.

An inverse chair

And portraits hung with care

Of men with purple hair

Make my house the best of them all.

A telly in the john,

Flamingos on the lawn,

And a huge moustache is drawn

On the porch of this, the best house of all.

And now I'm itchin'

For a bird's nest in the kitchen;

But the neighbors are bitchin'

About this, the best house of them all.

They say buyers will flee

If ever they see

The buffalo in my tree

Out front of this, the best house of all.

They say redecoration must stop,

Or house values will drop;

But, say I, how could I crop

The grandness of this, the best house of them all?

With balloons in the bedrooms

And carpets of mushrooms

A sauna, a carnival, a pig pen, a darkroom

All this and more in mine, the best house of them all.

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