by Adebowale Ajose

Created on: April 08, 2009   Last Updated: April 30, 2009

What do children really needFrom their parents? Let's back up to conception. The conception of humans is so interesting. Those nine months are a prototype of how to meet children's needs. What are children' s needs anyway?

The first thing is closeness. Closeness with children breeds their self confidence.[If dad's my pal........that's cool].It makes them bold and confident. The author of closeness is time. To get close to children,we need to spend quality time with them . That can't be achieved by leaving home early before they wake and returning late at night when they're asleep so as to be able to afford things for them. Things that depict OUR CLASS.....not theirs. Sure children love nice little things and they'll fall in love with those things........definitely not with the parent they hardly know. Yes ,that's what children's do with the time you spend with them........getting to know you. Children are great imitators and when you are not there to imitate.....they imitate whoever they spend most of their time with. It could be their friend,housekeeper,driver,the screen[television stations/computer sites] .... name it. Children don't need closeness;they crave for it.

Another need of children is love .Parents do love their children's but they sometimes get too overburdened to show it. There are different classes of parents:lone parents,single parents,widowed parents,married but unfulfilled parents. We sometimes show our children our frustrations rather than our love. Love is very different from gifts. Sometimes a smile means more to a child than a so called surprise pack. There's need to understand each child's love language and relate to him/her the appropriate way. Parents also need to manage stress levels effectively so it doesn't overspill. We're dealing with lives and a child deprived of love in the formative years most likely ends up to be a menace to the society. What's your child's love language?Speak it as often as you can. It's a call to everyone to love children. Show love to your children and any child around you. Starting from you, we'd begin to rid our society of prostitutes,robbers,murderers, assassins and other vices that stem from damaged self esteem.

If you love your child,you'd listen more and shout less. Shouting erodes a child's conscience and pulls him/her farther away faster than one can ever imagine. The first time I shouted at my son,he cringed. I noticed it,ignored it and silently felt happy that my method had worked. Subsequently,i

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