by Dallas Spires

Created on: January 29, 2007   Last Updated: December 28, 2011

In our society, sex is a hot topic. It's treated as if it's somehow set apart from every day life, something extra, not part of the normal way of things. In fact, it is part of the norm. Young people separate love and sex for several reasons, none of which are their fault. The blame for this rests very heavily on outside influences.

Sex is presented to young people as a kind of no-no. They know all the adults and other authority figures in their lives would be happy if they weren't having sex, so it becomes rebellious behavior. It's not about love. It's not about affection. It's not even really about the sex at that point.

You're sticking it to the establishment by having sex. It upsets mothers and fathers down to their very core. It bothers educators and other concerned citizens - you see it on public service announcements about teen pregnancy and safe sex. It's on the news: someone's upset because the schools want to teach about safe sex, when the parents don't want them talking about sex and encouraging the kids to go out and do it; government officials even get involved.

So what is this "sex" they don't want the kids doing? Of course they're going to go out and have as much sex as possible and come home pregnant -  condoms look like part of the establishment's anti-sex propaganda, so they don't get used as often as they should.

Young people are already curious about sex at a certain age anyway. Their bodies are whispering to them about it, because they're developing physically. They become interested naturally, biologically. And how do they hear about it? They see it glamorized - for lack of a better term - in TV shows and movies. They hear about certain aspects of human sexuality in songs. And they read about it in magazines.

It's all around them, inside and out. And the only people who aren't singing its praises are their parents and community leaders, the same ones who have probably told them they shouldn't watch those TV shows or movies, shouldn't listen to that god-awful music they love so much, who probably scoffed at their magazines. So, what do the kids do? What do you expect them to do? Sex becomes the goal, not love. Once sex is explored, then love can be considered, but first it's sex, sex, sex.

As a society, we need to embrace a healthier view of sexuality, and then we need to share that view with our children. They need to educated with truth, not lies, myths, and propaganda. There will always be that part of all of us that just wants sex with no strings attached, but we can, through education and a healthy look at it all, make that aspect of human sexuality less damaging. Once we stop treating Sex like an illegitimate child, maybe there won't be so many.

Learn more about this author, Dallas Spires.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.