by fran dreascher

Created on: April 05, 2009   Last Updated: April 11, 2009

Bipolar disorder is a disease of the mind, just as cancer is a disease of the body. With medication a person can live a long, fulfilling life while giving her children all of the love and attention they require. I am just such a person. I have bipolar disorder and I am the mother of two wonderful boys. If you ask my children whether or not they think I am a good parent, I can guarantee that the answer will be yes.

Life can be difficult living with bipolar disorder, but at the same time it can be wonderful. But life is not only difficult for those affected with disease but also for people healthy both in mind and body. Perhaps you know of a person who is a workaholic, spending countless hours at the office while their children remain in the care of a sitter. Is this a bad parent?

I believe the real question is, who is anyone to judge a person and a situation they know nothing about? There are people in this world not afflicted with disease that make terrible parents, physically and verbally abusing them. On the outside they may appear to be wonderful parents, with good jobs and typical lives, while in reality they are harming their children in unimaginable ways.

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, there are 5.7 million adults affected with bipolar disorder in this country. By making a judgment on a person's parenting ability by discriminating against them for a condition they have not asked for is simple ignorance. It is these same people who say African Americans should stay in the ghetto and Mexicans should go back home.

My children are very intelligent, very well-rounded boys. They score high marks in school and play various sports. If you were to look at us as a family, you would never be able to tell that I suffer bipolar disorder. I take my medication and take care of myself so that I can be there for my children. I love them no less than a parent who is lucky enough to not have to deal with this.

Rather than question the parenting abilities of people afflicted with disease, might it not be better to wonder how to help people in such situations? Bipolar disorder does not affect the way one feels for their children or the opportunities they would like to give them, but there are people in this world that cannot afford medication or do not have insurance so are unable to get a proper diagnosis. Perhaps we should stop making judgments and start finding ways to help those in our own backyard who weren't given the fairy tale life.

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