by Ana - I'm Learning

Created on: April 05, 2009

Let bygones be bygones - should be the motto of marriages. This means that both the husband and the wife should forget their romantic past and learn to live in the present. What happened in the past is best to left in the past. Similarly it is best to live in the present and forget about romantic affairs in the past.

Very often individuals are not able to overcome incidents in the past. Such people if they hear about incidents in the past they might get upset and let the past overcome the present. They would start imagining things in the past and let the past cloud their present relationship. For such people it is best that they do not know anything about the past. Some husbands tend to get carried over by the wife's past and begin to suspect her. Even if the relationship from the past is over he will continue to suspect her of maintaining links with the past. Under such a scenario, the marriage will be doomed. The relationship will fail establish and get off the roots. In such a scenario, isn't it better that the wife does not talk about her romantic past?

A lot depends on the personality of the wife as well. A successful marriage is a relationship between the husband and the wife. So whether a wife should tell her husband about the romantic past depends on her mind as well. If she thinks that such a revelation will build trust and help the relationship then she should talk about her past.

But the husband should be wise enough to not let the present get overcome by the past. The wife may if the situation so warrants come clean with the romantic events of the past. This will also help the wife to get incidents from the past weighing her heart or mind down. She should be able to start the new relationship with a clean slate.

It is equally important for the wife to remember that yesterday is gone and she should live in the present and devote herself to the current relationship. She should continue to devote all her strength, energy and attention in making her marriage successful.

At the end of the day, marriage is an understanding between the husband and the wife. It is left to the individuals to decide how they want to build and grow the relationship. It all depends on the strength of the relationship. In some cases it is important to share certain things and to hold back certain things. Often human beings forget that the past looks more attractive and inviting than the present. They tend to forget the trials of the past. But the past is a mirage which is never going to come back.

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