by Nick Somoski

Created on: April 04, 2009   Last Updated: April 07, 2009

Many people believe open marriages are a thing of the past. But, they're not - open marriages are still alive and kicking. Couples are still finding that swinging with other couples are a positive for their marriages. I'm not an expert in the subject, but whatever makes them happy, and whatever makes them truly believe that, I'm not going to argue with.

Most of the time, open marriages are good. But there are times when they can take a turn for the worse. Of course, I'm sure you can picture the scenes right now. A couple has just decided they want to open up their marriage. So, they go out, meet other open couples, and they have sex with each other.

Now where can this go wrong? Let's count the ways:

1. If there's no protection being used, other than birth control, heavy diseases like HIV/AIDS an be exchanged. Other than that, an unplanned pregnancy can occur. This is one of the worst negatives to the lifestyle, because anything's possible, after all.

2. More intimately, perhaps more than sex will happen. Perhaps feelings will get involved. What if your husband started falling for the other man's wife? What if your wife started falling for the woman's husband? The idea of open and honesty that takes place in open marriages will go right out the window. Secrecy will begin to take part - affairs will occur, and your marriage will end.

3. Couples in open marriages often set ground rules. Maybe they'll pick out a certain age group to swing with. Or, they'll agree not to cheat or not to do anything without the other's consent. Most couples choose to open their marriages because they're having troubles, and they're hoping doing this will broaden the horizon. Breaking these ground rules can be devestating to a marriage that's already on the rocks.

I believe that open marriages are good for couples who believe they're good. In the sexual revolution of the 1970's, open marriages were just evolving, and people were hopping on the train. Couples in open marriages were put on the spotlight for their immoral "playing." But now, people think open marriages have gone away. But, they haven't - they just aren't in the public eye anymore, and no one cares to fight them anymore. It's the decisions that these people make that can ultimately end up in wrong-doing. Things can go too far, and simple sex can turn into a web of feelings and emotions. It's when these things happen that an open marriage can turn into no marriage at all.

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