by Carla Roberson

Created on: April 04, 2009

Out of four perfect pregnancies came forth four healthy bouncing baby boys. After I got pregnant the fifth time, my husband and I were blessed enough to hear the words "It's a girl!" and my experience ever since has been completely surreal.

Upon her arrival, we looked at a simply beautiful, absolutely adorable baby girl. In the days to follow, we quickly discovered that our daughter was quite different than our boys. Obviously, she knew it too. From almost the very beginning little Kayla learned the skillful art of manipulation and her techniques were extremely sharp and quite clever. She would bat her long eyelashes and pout up her lips as she pointed to whatever it was that she so desired. Her brothers and my husband as well, all became like little puppets. Clearly they knew what she was doing. Quite frankly it didn't matter. They all moved robotically around the house bringing her whatever it was she desired. She would approach me with a bag of chips, a lollipop and juice boxes. With two words, "Open it" she would hand over the item and patiently wait until you responded to the command and hand it back to her. I never had a problem saying "no". After all, I'm a female too. I already know her artful tactics to achieve whatever it is she wants. I also know that these things are not good for a toddler and while most of the items she requests labeled as "choking hazards", she does not need to wrap her pudgy hands around everything she yearns for. I'm teaching my child a valuable lesson here. Unfortunately, the other male members of my household are not in accord with my methods for rearing "the baby". So, she sports a onesie that says it all "What baby wants, baby gets".

What are they teaching Kayla by giving her whatever she wants? Here are some of the negative doctrines they are teaching her by their simple actions:
To be dependent upon anyone that is willing to give her what she wants.
To simply ask for something, you don't need to work for it.
There are no consequences to pay for being selfish and acting out anger.
Screaming, crying and/or pouting will get you things you didn't get just by asking.

I know that most people would not find any of these qualities to be a serious issue with respect to a toddler. But we must be sensitive to our children's personalities and how we raise them from a very young age. A child does not turn into an a teenager overnight. Take it seriously from the beginning and I guarantee you, it will be much easier to instruct your child

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