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As I step towards the light, I am fearful of the unknown. The gates are just as I had dreamed - pearly with height beyond vision. I was scared, but wondered why? I am dead. Still, I step forward with hesitation.
The sign on the gate caught me off guard. Wait here, someone will assist you in a moment. "Even heaven has waiting lines", I thought to myself. So many people, so many souls. Off in the distance, I hear faint music and see she is moving toward me. I feel joy.
MOM, you look so healthy and beautiful, I say. She gives no response. I moved forward to hug. She moves away as if I was not hers. Mom, I call out with love. Her green eyes glare. I am mesmerized as I look into the eyes of my mother. I feel at home again.
If I had known I could see and speak to you, I would have died long ago, I admit. She glares through me. I've missed you Mom, just as you told me I would. My life was never the same without you, I express without breathing. She did not smile. She did not speak. I reached out and touch her. She is cold, yet I am happy to see you her. I love you... I say with tears as she disappears.
My GRANDMOTHER appears at the gate and lets me in. She too looks good, yet remains silent. Nana, I missed you, I cry. I hated becoming a woman without you. There is so much I want to tell you. So much I need to say. I cook really well, just like you taught me. I speak words, but wonder do they hear them? I ramble, because I am so happy to see them all. Nana, seeing you makes me feel I really am home.
I followed Nana through haze and entered a room with yet another sign. Quiet please. The sign baffles me. Are we not allowed to speak? But I have so much to say. I've waited so long to speak with all of you. Nana slips away. Heavenly music fades in.
My cousin TRISH is a welcome sight. While alive, we two enjoyed talking whenever together. I felt cheated when you died, I say. Trish smiles. She is so beautiful, just as the day we met. I had always wanted to know you better Trish, but you were gone so fast. Life was always too busy for me. Her eyes look away. I thought about you everyday Trish. Good thoughts. Again she smiles. I treasure your books and doll. I feel her warmth. She does not speak, just smiles. I hear a music echo as she leaves. Is that Jazz, I wonder?
Aunt DOT you came. The music gets louder. Please help me to understand. I am so happy to see you all. She too is silent. Will any of you please just say something.
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