by Terry Marsh

Created on: March 28, 2009   Last Updated: March 30, 2009

I often find myself confused by women. I've repeatedly seen wonderful women who consistently enter woeful relationships with the wrong men. I know that it's not always easy for women to weed through the muck and mire of men to find that diamond in the rough. I understand that mistakes can happen, and that people change. The way that a man initially presents himself may be completely different from who he really is.

But what do women really want in a man? I know what women say they want, because I make it a point to listen. But why is it that a good man, with a good job, who has decent credit, is sensitive to a woman's needs, and has a reputation for treating women well and performing well where it counts, still finds it difficult to find a good woman.

Women never cease to amaze me. Is it me, or do women sometimes say they want one type of man, but actually find themselves attracted to someone entirely different. I've heard that changing her mind is a woman's prerogative, but changing her mind in the midst of a relationship affects more than just her sense of independent thought. I respect that women can be complicated beings, and I sympathize with many of the challenges they've had to overcome. But I still have no idea what they really want.

In defense of the gender as a whole, I must admit that I always seem to be drawn to the same types of women. I love women who are confident and self assured. I love independent women, who are strong-willed and focused. I'm extremely attracted to a woman who is able to be comfortable in any environment, or in any situation. And a woman who can express what she wants, when she wants it, is an absolute turn on for me.

But I cannot understand when a woman who longs for a good man, settles for a man good for the moment. Or when after struggling through one bad relationship after another, engages in another with the same type of man. I get confused by women who save themselves for the right man, only to scare him away with her fierce independence and her need to control every interaction or decision. And what about the woman who says that she's looking, only to be looking in the wrong direction.

If women are God's gift to man, then what is a good man to a woman? I've come to understand that every woman has their own interpretation of what a good man is, and it isn't always as easily defined as trustworthy, honest, and committed. Women are attracted to physiques and personalities, just as men are. The other qualities are a bonus.

Other than that, I don't have a clue.

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