by Donna Marie Gray

Created on: March 25, 2009   Last Updated: March 27, 2009

I don't believe it is a requirement of being a parent to purchase their teens first car. There may be certain circumstances in which the parent feels obligated to do so, such as their being an affluent family and have always indulged the child's every whim. In this instance, the child is already accustomed to being handed everything without working for or earning it.

For the rest of society, a parent who is trying to teach responsibility to their children, and who believe their teenager has earned this privilege, the teenager should have become responsible enough to buy his/her first car (perhaps with minimal help from the parent), maintaining the upkeep, and buying their own gas. Otherwise, the teenager does not really appreciate the responsibility involved in owning a car. The vehicle in question does not have to be a brand new model.

As with so many things given to teenagers as a bribe, as a reward for doing what they should be doing in the first place, or allowing them far more freedom than is appropriate, we often find ourselves being pressured to keep on giving and making things far too easy for our kids. The lesson we should be teaching our teenagers is that the things they need... food, clothing, an education and being responsible, are the real necessities of life which the parents provide and encourage. Owning a car is a "want". Things they want need to be earned, they must be able to afford the care of a car and be responsible for it. This would involve, of course, that the teenagers have some kind of part time job in order to pay for their gas. The parents are responsible for insurance coverage and this alone can be very expensive.

It's a fact human nature dictates that when we work hard to obtain something we desperately want, it is far more valued and cared for than the things that are easy-come/easy-go. We tend to be much more protective of the things we have had to put a lot of work, money and time into getting. We are proud of the accomplishment. All of these contribute to being trustworthy and mature enough to have the responsibility of owning a car.

In all fairness, often times it becomes necessary for a teenager to have their own car. It is especially important when a teenager has a job, has activities during times when the parents may be at work themselves, or they have to be somewhat responsible for younger siblings. These are, however, a sign that the teenager is use to responsibility and is trustworthy. Parents may want to have an agreement with the teenager to help with the down payment on a vehicle in order to benefit all the family obligations.

For parents to purchase a car for a teenager who has no job, no means of maintaining the care and operation of the vehicle simply to avoid chauffeuring the teenager around is not the way to instill responsibility. The time comes when kids will be facing the real world which does not cater to their every whim. The time also comes when the parents find they are still taking care of their young adult off-springs and are wondering when they will grow up and move out. When you don't expect much from your teenagers, that is exactly what you get.

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