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Courage

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You may be filled with wisdom and knowledge, but if you lack courage and ambition, you may never accomplish your goals. In order for someone to have courage, they must first believe in themselves. Good self-esteem and a feeling of self-worth are not always easy to find when you look in the mirror. You need to believe yourself worthy in order to make your goals and dreams a reality. Just because someone has a beautiful singing voice and has studied music for years doesn't mean they have the courage to be judged on American Idol. Wisdom is great and can be achieved by learning, studying, and experiencing life. However, courage comes from within and is not so easy to attain.

After 38 years, I finally found the courage to put a stop to the abuse I have endured by my own mother. I have been so victimized by her that I prefer to refer to her as the person who gave birth to me. I have come to learn many things in my lifetime. I have many skills and talents but have not had the courage to perfect any of them, until now. I realized my potential of becoming a wonderful, happy parent, a successful writer, wife, singer, and business owner, however I had to find the courage to make her stop abusing me, in order to achieve any of these goals. I finally got to the point where I was prepared to send her to jail, but I really only wanted to move far, far away from her so I could live in peace. I knew I deserved to live a life without her negative presence, but I was afraid. She stole my joy of motherhood for many years, and when she successfully turned my own child against me, I knew it was time to end it.

Since her main obsession was obtaining custody of my son, and ruining my life in the process, I realized that if I gave my son's father sole custody, then she would leave me alone. Somehow I finally found the courage to stand up to her and allow my son's father, who has been absent sine his birth, a chance at being a father. He stepped up to the plate and helped me find the courage to leave. He found my family a beautiful new home to move to, 20 minutes from my son, and now she has to deal with my son's father. Even though I have two beautiful daughters, she cares only for my son. My family is free of her negativity, alcoholism, child abuse accusations, harrassing phone calls and manipulation. It took courage to admit my son would be happier living with his father, and even though my heart aches for him, each day I find the courage to look in the mirror and smile. He has a father, stepmom and three stepbrothers, and we visit him often. When I ask him if he's happy living with his dad, and he looks at me and smiles and says, "Yes!" I know that I did the right thing, better late than never.

Learn more about this author, Lori Bloom.
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