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The basics to conflict management is relatively easy, the first rule is identify what the true conflict is and deal with that issue effectively. Conflict, whether it is in the family, among friends or in the work place, will arise whenever there are two people, refuse to compromise or feel they are they one who are right. Left to itself even a small conflict will blossom to a full fledge battle. Dealing with the conflict is like peeling an onion. As you peel back the layers the true conflict will appear.

Know When to Step In

If the squabble is about something on a personal level, this is where the parties involved will have to work out their differences. All parties on the sideline need to step back and let the warring parties reach their own resolution to the problem themselves.

Should the conflict affect the family or workplace to the point where those around the people involved in the conflict are taking sides then the two parties involved need to set down to discuss the problem with a third party.

Identify the Conflict

Here is where the onion peeling process comes in. Usually by time the conflict gets to the point where something needs to be done to resolve the problem, there are smaller issues that have been piled on the original problem. By identifying the original conflict, the smaller issues will take care of themselves.

In the family, the conflict can be something as simple as someone wanting something another family member has or someone feeling the other family member is taking advantage of them. Usually with a little compromise and direct talking, the parties can work out their differences.

When the conflict arises in the work place there could be several underlying issues that need to be addressed. Perhaps one employee feels the other employee isn't fulfilling their job obligations. They often feel put upon when the other employee leaves work undone, which in turn adds to their workload. Many times to the outsider this environment resembles kindergarten behavior. The sad truth is it affects all the employees in the work place as when one employee finds fault with the other. Then the problem grows as the put upon person leaves extra work for the original slacking person without realizing they are really causing a problem for a third person not involved in their conflict. This scenario is more common than many managers realize as the situation starts out as minor and snowballs into a full-fledged problem.

Many managers wish to let the employees work the problem out for themselves and to stay out of the mix. Most of the time things will right themselves in a short period of time but that is not always the case. When a manager has to step in, then that is the time to lower the hammer and let the employees know it is time for the childish behavior to end. Differences need to be aired and resolutions to the problem need to be figured out. If for some reason these employees cannot resolve their differences then it is the time for them to move to other employment.

Agree to Disagree

Conflicts will occur as long as there are people with different opinions in this world. No one is ever going to agree with everything but they should be open to compromise. People have to respect that their fellowman has a right to their opinion just as you have the right to yours. While those opinions differ, it is a wise person who simply agrees to disagree without starting a feud or dragging more people into a conflict just to prove they are right.

Learn more about this author, Dee Cain.
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