by Krystle Hernandez

Created on: March 20, 2009

The definition of beauty is extremely subjective. What is beautiful to some people is truly abhorrent to others. Similarly, what some people consider "ugly" is considered to be truly breathtaking by others. Throughout the course of my life, I have often been asked the question: "Could you date someone who is ugly?" I only have one, simple answer to this question: Y-E-S, YES! In addition, not only COULD I date someone who is classified as "ugly" by conventional standards of attractiveness, I HAVE dated someone who falls into that category.

Many people have heard of the age-old adage that says, "Love is blind." In many ways, it certainly is. But, of course, the definition of "love" is just as subjective as the definition of "beautiful" or "ugly." Some people consider love to be an intense emotional connection between two individuals. In these cases, it is safe to say that love truly is blind, particularly as we can connect emotionally with a number of people with different physical attributes, some beautiful and others ugly. When you love someone as a result of an emotional connection, you feel a link to that person's inner makeup: personality, goals, values, morals, etc.

On the other hand, many people define "love" (or, rather, confuse love) with lust. These people often engage in relationships with people that they believe they are "in love" with based on physical attraction. People who connect with other individuals on the basis of their physical appearances more often than not have difficulty imagining whether they could really date someone who they did not find particularly physically attractive.

As I mentioned previously, I did, in fact, date someone who I felt I was not particularly physically attracted to, especially upon our first meeting. Not only did I find my ex to be "ugly" by conventional standards, I also found him to be rather repulsive. He was a sloppy eater, rarely combed the mop of hair that sat atop his head, and was upwards of two-hundred pounds at just five-foot-four inches tall.

However, while my ex-boyfriend may not have been the physical epitome of handsome, as I got to know him better and as we grew closer, I came to recognize aspects of his personality that were truly attractive. His kindness, sense of humor, and absolute devotion to me ultimately rendered him more attractive by the day.

It wasn't long before his inner beauty spilled out onto his exterior and I began to see "beauty" in his physical attributes as well. The eyes that I had written off as dark brown and muddy suddenly became soulful bowls of milk chocolate. The lips I initially thought were too small for his round face became a permanent pink pout that I could not wait to kiss. And, the list went on in on.

What I learned from dating my ex-boyfriend was that although he may not have been strikingly handsome upon first glance, his wonderful personality and inner beauty made him all the more attractive as time went by. So, not only COULD I date someone that is considered "ugly" by conventional standards, I encourage it! You never know what you might find.

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