by Lydia Workman

Created on: March 19, 2009

Many women are afraid of being single once they reach their dreaded thirties. There is this pressure to find that one special person before one's 30th birthday arrives. As a woman in her thirties, I have experienced that fear, and I now laugh in it's face. A woman should embrace the opportunity to get more in touch with her own individuality rather than lament on the fact that she is as of yet unmarried.

The idea of a single woman has been painted into a horrible picture. The lovely word 'spinster' is tossed out to describe a woman who stays single her whole life. We fear being that crazy old woman who talks to herself and has a million and one pet cats. There is no need to be afraid of any of this. Just think of being single as an extension of your twenties. It means you have more time to enjoy first dates, first kisses with new men, and meeting that special person. You are not left with having completed all these things. They are still just right around the corner.

Just think of it! You are only responsible for one single human being on this earth! You only have yourself to account for. You are not screwing up your children's life by being a rotten parent, nor are you locked into a commitment you may not have really wanted in the first place. Appreciate your singledom and relish in it. Enjoy every moment. When you do become a parent and/or wife to somebody you will have maturity on your side and have learned more than some younger parents.

There is no reason at all to be afraid. There are simply more excuses to get to know who you really are and explore all your own interests and hobbies. And, you will be a more interesting person as a result. While married women are cleaning up baby throw, you are free to take a class in ceramics. Or a class on acting, painting, cooking, or whatever else your heart desires. You have the time, freedom, and fewer responsibilities. Enjoy it while it lasts. Any day you might find that man who is quite right for you and your freedom might quickly be taken away from you.

Many women are waiting until later to marry and have children. This might be a wise decision when you think of the fact that about 50% of marriages end in divorce anyway. Better to take your time and be choosy than to commit to some person who you will grow sick of in a few years. Best to chase after your dreams a little longer and figure out even more about who you are and what you really like to do.

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