by Andrea-Lee Peters

Created on: March 19, 2009

As a woman it actually confuses me as to why women actually ask men this. If your wife or girlfriend utters these three terrible words chances are that she has already made a decision in her own mind about how she looks. She may actually look great, but maybe she is having a bad day and wants some validation that she still looks good. Or maybe she does think she has put on a few pounds and is looking to see whether you have noticed and are bothered by it. Either way, as a man you just can't win! Whatever you answer prepare yourself for the worst case scenario.

I would say from my own experience as a woman it is usually women who are less confident in themselves and their figure that are more likely to ask this question. They doubt themselves and their attractiveness, so they look for validation of themselves in your reply. Despite this insight, it is still an impossible question to respond to.

If the outfit truly does leave something to be desired and she is not flattering herself, how do you respond? Do you say "yes you do look fat?" The answer is "no" if you do need to say she has gained a few pounds then do it in the nicest possible way. Suggest another outfit as you think she looks better in a different one, say that you think you have gained a few pounds also, maybe you should go to the gym together. Although honesty is the best policy, there is a good and bad way to go about it.

Whatever you choose to do, don't lie to her. If she asks you the million dollar question and you reply, "No you look great!" and she doesn't, then it won't go in your favor. Even if she believes you, which she probably won't it will come back to haunt you at a later date. If she sees her girlfriends and asks them the same question, which she without a doubt will, and they reply with the truth, "well, I think you may have gained some weight," or "the outfit does make you look a little fat" then you will get the brunt of the anger. She will wonder why you didn't tell her the truth. She'll believe that you let her venture out in public not looking her best. She will wonder if you really care about her, because you didn't care enough to be honest!

Whatever the situation and whatever your answer to this fate determining question. Answer wisely! Answer with tact. Answer with something positive even if it is potentially negative. If you don't you will have to live with one angry woman until she gets over your betrayal!

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