by Rebecca Mikulin

Created on: March 18, 2009

There is a universally-accepted fact that pregnant women are irritable, weepy, picky and extremely demanding. Want to know a secret? We notice the changes in our personalities as much as you do, there's just not a lot we can or will do about it. Unfortunately the crying and 3:00 trips to the grocery store for yet another carton of double chocolate fudge ice cream can wear down on the dad-to-be's nerves. This can strain the relationship, and this is the worst possible time for additional strain...so what do you do? Obviously, some coping skills are in order.

First...I know it's easy for me to advise a completely open approach because I'm not the one whose head will be bitten off if it comes across wrong, but I still believe this is the best way to go about things. If you're getting way too drug out, not getting the sleep you need to function at work or at home, etc., then tell her. You may want to stay away from things like "I'm too tired" or "I feel like you're asking too much from me"; you can probably see where these could lead to trouble. Instead, try requesting ten minutes to yourself every day after work before anything is asked and be sure to keep well-stocked on any food she might be craving to avoid those late-night grocery store runs.

"Take time for yourself," everyone says it and it may seem impossible to do sometimes, especially as your lady love grows ever larger and needs your help to get out of the bathtub, tie her shoes and so on. Here's a tip...buy her some flip-flops and make an agreement that one evening a week you're going to go out with your friends for some decompression time. Be sure to make a specific agreement ahead of time about how long you're going to stay out and stick to it, she might be feeling a bit abandoned (or she might be enjoying her favorite soap operas without you in the house to complain about them) so it's important for her to know when you'll be home. As it gets close to "the big day" be sure to let her know exactly where you are - which better be close to home in case you get that frantic "it's time" call - and be near a phone that she has the number to at all times. Score some extra brownie points by checking in with a call or text message every hour or so and drop by the store for a package of a food she's been craving to surprise her when you return.

Now if you're interested in easing the "hormonal outbursts" altogether hugs, kisses and compliments go a long way. In today's society skinny is often equated with beautiful so you can bet most of us feel like ugly, bloated cows during pregnancy so every bit of attention can do a world of good toward easing the stress and anxiety related to carrying that baby.

Finally, work with your pregnant partner to set up a "time out" spot for yourself and rules regarding its use. To avoid confrontations it's always important to have a place to go and calm down before you hit the end of your rope, so be sure she knows that's one place you should not be disturbed in. Try to use time outs sparingly and for a reasonable amount of time; too much and she'll eventually be forced to break the rules of time out just because she needs your help.

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