Recognizing our own internal dialogue gives us greater freedom to live our life, consciously and in the present moment. I am a conscious empath, with the ability to feel shifts and changes in emotions and feelings. I am also very intuitive. Quite an interesting combination for a woman, especially an Aries woman. Life has always been this way for me, as far back as a 5 year old child, I remember having this ability.
As a teenager and well into my 20's, there was a constant stream of dialogues going on in my head all the time. There were many times in my sensitive life, where a disagreement took place with another person, and although I had the ability to sense and feel what was happening, I had no personal sense of myself, or my boundaries. I found myself constantly overwhelmed and overloaded and crosswired mentally and emotionally. I knew that I was feeling things that were not mine to fix or feel and yet, did not know or much less understand how to detangle myself from the experience. So, I would just keep on feeling it, believing it was all mine to deal with.
It wasn't until my mid 20's, actually 25 to be exact, that I finally had a conversation with a boss friend of mind. She had shared some of her own personal traumatic life experiences with me and I was in awe that she was able to speak of her experiences and hold her head high, in the process. She was fortunate enough to come across a very loving, and caring and kind counselor, with a very cutting edge approach to healing deep emotional pain. After sharing one of my many life experiences with her, she offered the counselors name and phone number to me; it was the best gift that I could give to myself. And so my process of healing began.
Soon after, my empathic and intuitive abilities were calling for attention. Again, I was fortunate enough to be in the right time and the right place for this new understanding to take place and integrate into my life.
As I learned and developed my own intuitive knowing, I found myself feeling very drawn to teaching what I was learning. It felt very natural. It was while teaching psychic development and the Tarot, that my mental focus began finding new ways to verbally express what I was feeling. I started feeling great relief from my early years of feeling overwhelmed and overloaded with the energy around me.
Once again, I found my developing awareness , stepping into the next level of discovery, very naturally; right time, right place kind of thing, until I found myself incorporating spiritual practices, along with affirmations. It wouldn't be until my early 40's, that I really started "logically" understanding the thread and connection to all of these practices, that would eventually teach me about how to have a balanced internal dialogue going on inside of me. It took much patience and consistent practice, to apply spiritual concepts, that resonated deep within me, for my logical mind, to begin accessing a better approach for conflict resolution.
Yes, there were times, that resolution did not come and it meant that it was my time to move on and move forward from the relationship or the experience I was in.
We are living in times of great change. We all know what this change is beginning to look like and feel like. As a conscious empath, what I share in consultations or groups that I teach, is that we need to know what is happening on the inside of ourselves at all times. We need to know what the conversations or dialogues are that going on in our heads, thoughts, and our minds. We need to understand, that if we are not aware of what is happening within our thoughts, then this energy, will create a feeling, that can throw us out of balance with ourselves.
Because we are experiencing an evolution of our humanity and our emotions are now being affected by this life experience, it is the dialogue within minds that can give us great freedom, great relief and bring better understanding to our life experiences. We don't need to hate ourselves, or put ourselves down for our negative thoughts, however, with patience and practice, bring greater insight to why we are having our thoughts and learn a new way and a better approach for the dialogues within.
It took me 10 years, everyday, for 2 hours a day, whenever I read something with a clearer understanding for an experience, I would highlight and take notes in the book. Eventually, I found myself writing my highlighted information in a journal, so that each and everytime I came across an experience, instead of resorting to old habits and practices, that were not healthy and satisfying, I would go to my journal and reread a new concept or pull the Tarot, for deeper insight. As a teacher, this was the best thing that I could do for myself. But it would take 10 years to really ground this new awareness, logically, as my new internal dialogue.
There is something to be said about knowing ourselves. There is so much internal freedom and lift to our emotions and our spirit. There is also greater clarity and balance. It becomes our checkpoint system, in staying clear, grounded and present in our bodies and in the present moment.
Our internal dialogue is there as a guide, to teach us how to go deeper, to a place of greater wisdom and insight, however, first we have to give up our control about making this right or making it pretty or being right about anything. Awareness of our internal dialogue, when we access from a better place of understanding, becomes our balance point and a place of resolution for everyone.
Knowing our own internal dialogue brings the greatest freedom and the greatest rewards for learning about ourselves, based on what is in our hearts. Yes, this too is a journey and it will bring some challenges and resistance in the beginning, however, patience and persistence will pay off and not only will you know the difference, you will also be able to feel the difference. It becomes about living life from our soul's knowing and finding greater awareness and balance for each life experience.
We can do this; one breath, one step, one moment at at time.