by Jennifer Eblin

Created on: March 14, 2009   Last Updated: March 15, 2009

My ex and I decided to break up. It was no one's fault, just something that happened. I went a little crazy dating other men, trying to prove to myself that I didn't need the ex in my life to have fun. Then it happened, we got back together. I kindly let all those guys know that I was off the market, but that didn't stop one of them from occasionally crossing my mind. One night he crossed my mind at a very inopportune time.

For a few days after it happened, I let myself wonder what it meant or if it meant anything at all. I was happy with my boyfriend, but I had to admit that the sex wasn't always the greatest. Sometimes we tended to rush through things fairly quickly, especially after a bad day. Sex with the other man was completely different. He liked to take his time, making sure I was completely satisfied before he worried about himself. It wasn't that I didn't love my boyfriend or even being with him in the bedroom, it was just something that happened.

I'll admit that it doesn't happen very often, but it does happen sometimes and I'm not really ashamed of that fact. It was years ago that it happened for the first time. Since then I've moved on, both from my boyfriend at the time and the other guy. The funny thing is that I later got together with the other man and the sex was nowhere as good as it seemed in my head.

That's the great part about having fantasies and sometimes thinking about someone else in bed. It gives you the chance to imagine the perfect scenario and to help speed up the process if you're having a hard time concentrating on the person in front of you. Of course I'll never tell the guy I'm with if I'm thinking about someone else and I hope that no man ever tells me that he was thinking about another woman.

The fact of the matter is that sometimes it just happens. If you try to convince yourself that you'll never think of someone else while you're in bed with your partner, I guarantee that it will happen. You also shouldn't worry about what it means because in all honesty it probably means nothing. The one and only thing it might mean is that you have a healthy sex life and that you're probably looking to do a little more experimenting than you did in the past.

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