by Dr Raph Azrin

Created on: March 14, 2009

'For everything that lives will face death' is a verse in the Quran and that is the belief of Judaism,Christianity and even all across the board but how do one prepare himself to meet the maker is another altogether. It's been a belief that 40days before one dies, the person will know it is coming and prepares for death,settling whatever is neccessary, repenting, calling all dues and debts and making sure the loved ones left behind are being cared for.I face death too often in my line of field and many, regret going forward without saying their final goodbyes.

To leave without having to be able to say goodbye and to leave as such is the biggest regret one may feel and thus creating this aura of an unpeaceful soul.But given the opportunity to prepare myself as if I'm on death row, I have a huge task on my plate. Of a few things is to make sure all my money are out of the bank so that my loved ones can have them and not to hassle with Official Assignee issues like many my friends faced, and that my will is updated and to scratch and taking the last few hours in the company of the loved ones..seeing them happy one last time. I always try to do so,especially that my lttle girl will brighten my day however life threw a curve ball at me and hitting me under the belt. Adults however are totally different.

I remembered my late grandfather was so happy to see me one last time..as I was just released from my tour and that he was babbling away in pain as he had multiple cancers of the heart,lung and colon. We knew he was leaving and it was still in the month of Eid that really made me sad, to see him go, for I did not cherish the last moments with him, for like what I did with my great grandfather, grandmother for the dying will reveal many secrets that are not known to man unless he is of another. I seen patients do that to me...saying stuff so they can be at peace.That their final orders are carried out, and the words of the loved ones be immortalised in their memory, for the soul never dies.

If it's possible, I will up my insurance policy or likewise and making sure my departure will be without any further pain to the living. My late grandmother did that. Wrote down her last wishes and even paid the care takers of the funeral money for the family and I was quite gob smacked when that happened. Same as my maternal one, whom I dropped and left my life in UK back home, to see her, for she was begging to see me.That she was drinking Coke..and well, thing is she would never drink coke as it's only me who drink that with her. And that I was surprised my little girl hugged and cared at her great grandmother for the first and last time in her life..and my dying grandmother who was not sick,offered the coke to her and drank together, for it remembered her of the good times of me and her. I regretted then that I left home 2 days early that I could not say my final goodbye or kissed her one last time. All she said was she was going home, and asked me to take care of the family.

To me, if I were to die today, I would like that to happen. Nothing else, to make sure those you left behind were happy before you go.Kids are without prejudice and they sense it, for they know it all. Nothing else matters, for that is the only thing that will carry me to the grave.

And of course, forgiveness from everyone, especially you who is reading this.

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