by Laura Houston

Created on: March 12, 2009

My First Tattoo

Pure and simple rebellion was the reason for my first tattoo. I had left home at 17. I did not enjoy my childhood, suffered physical abuse at the hands of my brother, and mental abuse at from my father and step mother. I felt I had to do something for myself that I knew they would never have permitted.

My thoughts were: I had spent my entire life doing what they, my family, wanted. I had to do something that they would not want, or would be extremely jealous of. It did not hurt as I expected, in fact I felt no more then annoyed by the piercing of the ink needle. I began with a unicorn on my right shoulder. It was beautiful, the only thing about my body that I felt was beautiful, being told constantly how ugly I was my own self worth was little, but when I got that tattoo I felt like part of me became beautiful that day. I went back to my apartment and admired it in the mirror for what seemed like hours. I made sure to put cream on it, and it shined beautifully when I did.

This was mine, and no one could take it away. A beautiful prancing unicorn offering me a mystical pattern, a new beginning to my life, that had not been mine. Funny thing was I never even let my parents know about it. When I went to visit I would be sure to wear sleeved shirts that were dark enough that my tattoo did not show through. Still living in fear of what they would think... Never understanding why until much later in life. I don't believe they found out about it until I was in my late 30's.

It didn't matter that I could not tell my parents, because I still felt as though it gave me control of my life, my body. I had determined what I would do with my body, nobody else made that decision for me this time. When I felt at my lowest points I would go to the mirror and look at my tattoo, and say I can do what I want with my life it is mine to do with now. No one held the controller for my life now. I truly believe my tattoo helped save my life, and make it my life again.

I now at 44 am the proud owner of 3 tattoos. The elegant prancing Unicorn on my right shoulder, a beautiful rose set in four leaves on my right wrist, and an adorable surfing teddy bear on my left bicep. I do not regret a single one, and receive constant comments on the rose that is on the top of my right wrist, serving as a constant reminder to me that I can find beauty although surrounded by many thorns in this world.

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