by Claire Chock

Created on: March 10, 2009

With the seeming delinquency of teens and the age gap between teens and their parents increasing, it seems obvious that repairing that connection is imperative. A common rite of passage (I'm thinking special initiative ceremony)is a good idea for reconnecting with your teen but doesn't address the whole issue. For a common rite of passage to work as a bonding tool, it must hold meaning for both you and your teen, otherwise it does nothing and becomes pointless. Why do something if it has no meaning or value on the part of the participants?

That question touches on the true issue of teen problems, the lack of meaning or purpose in their lives. Teens are trying to make sense of the world and the world tends to help their confusion by giving false leads to happiness. Our culture teaches that fame, money, power, and other material things can bring happiness, so we chase after them. Sex and drugs are also things that claim to bring happiness, but for how long? These things are illusory to me, drugs and sex only give a temporary high. Many people who have money, fame, fortune or all three still feel empty. If this can't bring lasting happiness, what can? I'll get to this question later.

I just saw an article in the newspaper of a man charged with killing his girlfriend's 2 month old daughter. The sad thing is, this is nothing new, I've read stories like this before, they're all over the news. I have to ask one question though, why? Why do people do things like this? Teens ask this same question and it's what jades them so bad. With the stories we hear on the news and the issues that arise around the world, is it any wonder they're jaded? To answer my why question though, I think it's because in many instances, self-interest wins out against any ethical or moral sense we have. This is also my answer to what can bring us lasting happiness. While America is still mainly a Christian nation, there's no way to tell whether people actually practice their beliefs or how strongly they believe what they do. I think if teens and people in general were more deeply rooted in a religion and brought their beliefs into their daily lives, our sense of ethics might not get trumped so easily by self-interest and the illusory happiness of what our culture offers. It would also give teens a sense of purpose and meaning. It would show them that they're not just a result of a cosmic accident that spawned life and have no reason to be here but that they're the creation of a higher power, whoever or whatever that may be. I'm not saying everyone needs to be Christian, I believe God is the only one who can make us happy but that's a debate for another paper. Other religions can give a sense of purpose and meaning too, so I'll let it rest at that.

If we want to close the gap between parents and teens, parents need to root themselves in some kind of belief that combats the jadedness the world can seem to encourage by strengthening ethical values like charity, kindness and compassion. If they do this, I think teens will see the benefits those values can bring and will take them on as their own thus making the world a bit better of a place to live.

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