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When faced with pregnancy, most women will go through many emotional ups and downs. When a woman is facing an unwanted or unexpected pregnancy, that emotional rollercoaster becomes even more terrifying. Two years ago I was faced with the very same situation. I was already a married mother of two going through a divorce, and had involved myself in an admittedly unstable and frivolous relationship with someone who was both financially and emotionally unequipped to handle a pregnancy, much less actual child care. My options were attempting to care for the child with an irresponsible father and his domineering parents, abortion, or adoption to a hopefully caring home.

I agonized for months over the decision, telling myself that I still had plenty of time, when in fact the clock was spinning out of control. I had toyed with the idea of both abortion and adoption, looking at websites, reading horror stories, and attempting to convince myself that my lifelong anti-abortion policy was at that point null and void. I had always said that abortion was the choice of the mother, and the burden would be on her soul. Now I was the one in that never easy situation, and I just could not bring myself to choose death for the baby.

Four months into my pregnancy I decided that the time had come for a choice. So I Googled adoption agencies, wrote down the phone number of the first one that popped up, and drove my car into town and away from the prying ears of the birth father and his family. I called and gave them my information over my cell phone; then drove home in the dark, shaking with fear and relief.

A few days later, the call was returned and I spoke to a wonderful woman named Sarah who would change my life and give me hope. She sent me packet upon packet of portfolios. All these smiling faces and wonderful stories, families waiting for the chance to be parents to a child they knew they couldn't have on their own. I pored over them, searching for the spark that would make the one stand out, but rejecting them all in turn. Sarah, being ever patient and wonderful; continued to send me the packets, and reassurd me of the normalcy of wanting the 'perfect' family. And I found them.

Two of the most wonderful, amazing, loving, and generous people I have ever met. I connected with them at first through pictures, then later on with phone calls. The agency helped me into moving into a place on my own in order to get away from the physical and emotional abuse I had been suffering at the

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