by Veronica Bergschneider

Created on: March 06, 2009   Last Updated: March 07, 2009

Philosophically speaking, love comes in several varieties. According to the ancient Greeks, and as found in the New Testament of the Bible, three types of love are key in how the world works. First, there exists the love Greek philosophers call agape, which is the all-encompassing love found only given by the creator to all of creation. When speaking of love, many mortals tend to think only of Eros, the romantic love and lust one has for a romantic partner.

However, the third type of love found in this philosophical system, philos, becomes most important in binding people together. Many people refer to this as "brotherly" love, meaning that it brings together people who may or may not be related biologically in very powerful relationships with one another. For many, this type of love is the most difficult to discover and share with others.

It must begin with an inward acceptance of one's self and some awareness of what one is all about. Once the person seeking friendships discovers his or her true passions, it then becomes possible to seek out others with whom to share those interests. These common interests and passions give each person a better chance to form solid initial bonds with another, and as the friendly love develops between the people, they can expand outward to more commonalities.

As the common bounds are found and forged, friends grow in trust for one another. They share secrets, some of which may not be known to anyone outside the friendship. From this trust comes the love they need to remain in each other's friendship through good times and bad times. The friendly love will allow them to support each other in the proper paths and discourage inappropriate actions between them and toward people outside their relationship.

Friendly love can become quite deep between the parties to the friendship, and often in the case of opposite-sex friends, can confuse those outside the friendship as to what is going on. In such a case, it is perfectly all right to love a friend, even deeply, but any limits that may have been set as to how involved the people can get in each other's lives must be respected. In a friendship where the level of love is kept within the proper boundaries, each partner can feel free to bring anything that bothers him or her to the other friend for discussion. This becomes important in cases where one person senses that the other may be harboring feelings beyond friendship so that the ensuing discussion can defuse whatever is going on and restore the friendship to a point where it feels right for both.

In a friendship grown this way and set upon a foundation of love, both friends have many opportunities to grow as people. They get excited to see each other's successes and try to learn what they can from each other's knowledge and failures. Without such friendly love, it is therefore impossible to relate correctly with the other inhabitants of our planet in ways that enrich everyone's lives.

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