by Debbie Robus

Created on: March 04, 2009

When my grandfather passed a car and scraped the entire driver's side - and never even knew he touched anything - my mother wrestled with what to do about his driving. Grand-dad was adamant that he could still drive... even though at almost 80, he had lost most of his vision and hearing. Ultimately, the "solution" came in the form of an excuse. A beloved grandson who lived in Texas "needed" a car... and Grand-dad rather reluctantly gave his to him. That was after Mother had tried everything, including hiding his keys or taking them home with her. And for awhile, Mom compromised - Grand-dad could keep the car in the carport... but he was not to drive it! It got to where the easiest way to avoid a conflict was to try and second-guess my grandparents and drive them wherever they needed to go. But as fast as we could think ahead of them, they could outdo us, so that only worked to a point. So the ultimate decision to give away the car was a blessing.

There is no set answer to the question, "How old is too old to drive?" And there is also no set solution to the problem of those elderly drivers who refuse to give up their car or driving it. Believe it or not, some people DO give up their cars voluntarily. My great-aunt decided on her own that she was no longer a good driver, and she called her grandson one day and said, "I want you to sell my car. I'm not driving any more." Oh, that it were always that easy!

My paternal grandmother drove until she was in her early 90's. Mam-maw's life centered around her car. It spelled FREEDOM for her, and she was extremely reluctant to give it up, even after backing out into another car and a few other fender benders. She drove a two-tone Chevy impala (I think it was a 1968 - Army green with a white top) - it was a TANK! So she was not hurt, but she really did a number on the other person's car.

In 2003, Mam-maw fell and had to go to the nursing home for about 3 months of rehab. The following year, she fell again and had to return for more rehab. This time, she was so weak and sick that we questioned whether she could even return home, at 91 years of age. Mam-maw did go home, but she realized she was not able to drive any more, and she asked my sister and brother-in-law to sell her car. They did - for $500, and she was thrilled. However, in recent years as her health has improved somewhat, she has commented, "If I just had my car, I could take myself lots of places!" We are thankful the car is gone!

My friend's father drove an old

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