by Jennifer Moore

Created on: March 04, 2009

To punish a child means to discipline them so, to discipline a child would mean to punish right? Well, that's not necessarily so. As parents we have a goal and responsibility to raise our children to be responsible people, capable of independently making good choices. During the journey of parenthood, we are given many opportunities to instill our beliefs, morals and values in our children. Our job is to show them what is expected from them as a family member and as a member of society. We teach them how to behave at home, in public, at school and other places. We teach our children how to treat belongings, themselves and other people. By teaching our children what behaviors and actions are acceptable, we are disciplining them.

Punishment is one method we use to discipline our children. A punishment can range from a mere time out to the extremes of inflicting physical and/or emotional pain. The degree to which a child is punished varies among countries. As physical punishment becomes an increasingly controversial subject. In the United States, this method of punishment becomes increasingly frowned upon while many eastern countries continue to make use of this method. Just recently the media has been showing pictures of .Azharuddin Mohammed Ismail, one of the child stars from the new movie Slumdog Millionaire, and his father. One of the pictures shows Azharuddin crying after his father slapped him for wanting to rest after his flight home rather than more press interviews. While many Americans have criticized the 10 year old boy's father, both father and son have stated that the father was disciplining the boy for his (the boy's) own good.

Equally important and often used as an alternative to physical punishment is a method called positive reinforcement. In this method, parents bring attention to and praise positive behavior, which does not have to be over the top and should remain simple and sincere. An example of this method would be "good job, I'm happy to see that your using your manners." Over rewarding a child for a job well done can actually have an effect opposite the desired results, the child can begin to lose interest and enjoyment in activities they are over rewarded for.

As parents continue to find the best methods to teach and reinforce appropriate behaviors and actions (a.k.a. discipline), they will be faced with many choices. Uncertainties about which method is best to teach the family values, which method is best to reinforce behavior and if punishment is a chosen method, which punishment best fit's the "crime." One thing is certain and if kept in mind, can help parents determine the most effective and appropriate methods of discipline for the family - the objective. The objective when disciplining children is not to raise obedient children but rather to raise responsible children capable of making good choices.

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