by Susan Fenton

Created on: March 02, 2009

Forty used to be considered the birthday which marked the irretrievable loss of youth. Upon reaching that impressively sobering age, one could look forward to the sure and steady encroachment of gray hair, wrinkles, arthritis, and a host of other, more debilitating, maladies. Happily, improved health care, a good diet and plenty of exercise (not to mention the increasing availability of cosmetic surgery) have changed that perception. With the average American lifespan now at 80 years for women and almost 75 for men, people turning 40 can reasonably expect to look good and feel healthy for years to come, cruising past 50, breezing on towards 60. If they aren't a sign of our imminent decline, how then should we view these "big number" events?

As well as providing an occasion for a surprise party, milestone birthdays offer unique opportunities for reflection. Yes, we could pause and reflect on any given day, but our busy lives have a way of keeping us distracted and preoccupied. Years may go by without us taking stock of ourselves and the journey we've been on. A milestone birthday is definitive proof of the passage of time, and that undeniable reality often compels us to self-examination.

Before beginning the personal inventory, let's briefly consider the origins and purpose of ancient milestones.
As far as historians have been able to determine, they were first used in the Roman era. Stone obelisks were etched with the relevant details, and then erected to inform travelers of the distance to the next town. Mile markers are still commonly used today and can be found along any major highway or interstate, helpfully telling us how far we have yet to go (and by inference, how far we've already come.)

Just as journeying Romans did when they encountered a milestone, so we too have occasion, when arriving at a significant birthday, to contemplate our progress. First of all, and by far the most important, we can determine whether or not we are on the road we planned to take. Does the path we're traveling take us where we expected to go? If not, some course-correction may be in order. A little backtracking - such as making that long-dreamed-of career switch, pursuing additional education, volunteering for a charity or learning a new skill - may be necessary to find the road that leads to the desired destination.

After you've assured yourself that the path you are on is the one you want, consider the progress you've made. You might be pleasantly surprised at the distance traveled, or perhaps a little chagrined that you haven't come further, but in either case you have a chance to alter the pace of your life. Maybe you'd like more dinners with intimate friends, hikes in the cool autumn woods, or organized photo albums. On the other hand, perhaps you'll find that fewer "Friends" reruns, cheeseburger baskets, and rude gestures while driving will be in order. Whatever the case, now is the time to make those adjustments that will result in a more satisfying journey.

And what if the path you're on is the one you want, and you're pleased with your progress? Time to celebrate! Invite some friends to join you, dance, and be thankful for the abundant gift of a rich, full life. Even if you aren't just where you'd hoped to be, you can and should celebrate the wonder of your existence. Sure, you may need to make provision for the rest of the journey, but don't forget to rejoice in the present - the miracle of the life you have here and now.

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