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Life support: Should the wishes of the family take precedence over the patient's right to relieve his own suffering?

Results so far:

No
89% 1314 votes Total: 1478 votes
Yes
11% 164 votes

As I sit here, healthy and of sound mind, considering what I would choose for myself if I ever needed to be put on life support, I realize what an enormous decision it is. It's simply impossible for me to decide now what would be best, having no real understanding of what I and my family will be facing. There are too many unknown possibilities concerning my condition, and the effect it would have on those I love. I would not presume to dictate what should be done with so little knowledge. I realize, also, that it's not about me.

I very well may be able to live, and enjoy life, in a compromised physical condition. However, there are limits to what I would be willing to endure. While I would still find joy in life as a partial amputee, or quadriplegic, I would not want to be completely incapacitated and entirely dependent on others for my care. There is a great difference between these extremes, and I would not know where I would draw the line between what I could live with and what I could not. Even more important is the burden my condition would place on my family. I know I am loved, and my family would do anything I needed, but it is really fair for me to define what they should be willing to do? At what point does my care simply become too much to ask? The physical requirements alone are enough, but I am more concerned with the emotional toll it would take on them. The love and respect I have for them demands that I trust them to be able to make these decisions, with everybody's best interest in mind, having greater knowledge than I have now.

While I am a person of enduring hope who believes in miracles, I know that miracles do not always come. Sometimes God has a plan that is different than my own. There will come a day when His plan involves my death, and it is not for me to decide when and how that day will come. I have lost loved ones, and seen the beauty that He can bring out of the greatest loss. It is often in these times that we grow closer to Him, and our faith grows stronger. I would not want my desire to live to interfere with His plan and deny my family the opportunity to experience the good He can bring, even from my death.

Like anyone, I want to live a long healthy life, to die peacefully in my bed at a nice old age. I'm realistic enough to know it's not for me to decide how it will happen or be handled. Whatever may come, I trust God's plan, and I trust those I love to make decisions based on their own love and faith.

Learn more about this author, Susan Manning.
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Below are the top articles rated and ranked by Helium members on:

Life support: Should the wishes of the family take precedence over the patient's right to relieve his own suffering?

Yes
  • 1 of 13

    by Michelle Edge

    The debate over patient's rights to relieve his/her own suffering and the family wishes are, undoubtedly in my opinion a

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  • 2 of 13

    by Ted Sherman

    There is no absolutely correct answer to this question. Each case, especially at the end of a very old patient's life, has

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No
  • 1 of 112

    by Nancy Todisco

    Life is precious, joyful, and one heck of a bumpy roller coaster ride. Some of us live cautiously, never forgetting to buckle

    read more

  • 2 of 112

    by Elaine Sihera

    In one word, NO! It is natural for the relatives of a patient to want them alive for as long as possible. If we truly love

    read more

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