by Laurie Boris

Created on: February 28, 2009

Fibromyalgia is a disease that can have a ridiculous array of side effects, but is mainly characterized by widespread muscle pain, trouble sleeping, and fatigue. If you have been diagnosed with fibromyalgia, you may already know some ways to deal with your physical symptoms, whether that's by medication, or by lifestyle changes such as getting regular exercise and improving your diet.

What you may not know is that one of your greatest weapons against fibromyalgia is enlisting your family's support. Because when you feel lousy, don't you want to bathe in the warm sympathy of people who love you? When you are so tired you can barely move, and when you're in so much pain you can't even think of doing the simplest of errands, don't you want to feel like the people in your household will support you by pitching in?

But it's not enough to take it for granted that just because your family members love you, they are going to understand what fibromyalgia is. Or what you're going through, or that they will automatically be sympathetic to the extra care and help you sometimes might need.

Because fibromyalgia is not a "visible" disease or illness, many people will look at you and think that nothing is wrong. Why can't you make dinner, or drive the kids around, or bend over and pick up all that laundry? You aren't in a wheelchair, you don't have a cast on your arm, or the pallor of someone who is extremely sick, and so it may be hard for people to be sympathetic.

And some of these people may live in your own home.

The optimal tool to start with is communication. Just leaving some books or pamphlets around, hoping people will pick them up and read them, isn't going to cut it. This might be your first lesson in the way fibromyalgia forces you to take control of some of the stressful things that make your symptoms feel worse. It's up to you to start the process.

Explain to your spouse (and your children, if you think they're old enough to understand) what fibromyalgia is, and what it means to your day-to-day life. Tell them that on some days you feel better than on other days. That you will have days when you can do a lot, but then you will have some days when you feel really bad and can't do much at all. Maybe you won't even be able to get out of bed. Tell them that when you're having a bad day, and you ask for help, it doesn't mean you're being lazy or that you're trying to get out of doing chores.

That part is going to be difficult for some of your family members to understand.

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