by Sophie Cooke

Created on: February 28, 2009   Last Updated: March 02, 2009

It's disheartening (worse, horrifying) to think that a boy could pass himself off as me online.

And there are already too many laws and safeguards in practice to make it sensible or practicable to invent more.

Unfortunately, we need to make people more aware that this goes on, and open their eyes to simply THINKING about determining gender - where it matters!

I mean, does it really matter if a boy passes himself off as you online?

If it's somewhere - like Helium, a blog, or a website - where comments and opinions are being posted, then no! Such messages are valid whether they come from 'boys' in skirts or 'girls' in boxer shorts.

BUT if it's in a personal email, on a dating site, or in a chat room, then YES! And I think all that we can do about it is to make everyone - especially teenage girls - aware that they are communicating with a person in 'cyber space' and that 'cyberstalkers' are quite common.

Now, having said that, I don't believe that the majority of them are inherently evil. I believe that most men who do it (and about 98% of them are men) simply do so because it's easy to do.

Like "why do you climb a mountain?". "Because it's there".

So "why do you pretend to be female on line?". "Because I can".

It's a thrill. After all, don't we all get a thrill of pretending to be something we aren't?

I don't want to give Helium writers ideas, but I'm sure I could pretend to be Stevie Cooke and write about football, music, and women as objects - and you wouldn't know. So it's not only a thrill, it's a challenge.

But, having set up the 'reasoning', let's attack it. How do you determine that I'm female? Well, I suppose if I start analysing my writing, I might be giving ideas to men wanting to be women online. So I'll just make one suggestion (more available in private) - and that is that I don't believe a man could ever see himself as second to a woman. So he would ALWAYS refer to the traditional ''he or she', 'him and her' and use 'he' in situations where either could apply. I tend not to because I know I'm superior to a man! (Is this whre I pretend to be a teen and put 'lol'?)

BUT there are of course the few men who ARE intending evil by deception. That is where necessary caution comes in - teach kids to be careful and to NEVER trust a stranger with intensely personal information.

Of course a simple way of weeding out the perverts is, if they ASK you for personal info. No female is going to request your bra size or be persistent about wanting a photo. In fact I tend to be suspicious if someone volunteers a photo before even starting an online 'friendship'. It's likely to be a man desperate to 'prove' he's a woman by sending you a picture of an acquaintance he thinks is attractive!

That's my thinking anyway.

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