by Travis Casey

Created on: February 28, 2009

It's funny how once an article starts on a downward spiral, there is no return without a frog. I have recently had two articles in topics of 100+ articles. Both settled in at number 20-25 and would fluctuate 1 or 2 places every so often, but they seemed quite comfortable in their top 25% homes and I was content to let them live their lives there. After all, they were in big neighbourhoods but they were living in areas which attracted stars.

Then one day, one of the articles decided to go walkies and started hanging out with some unsavoury characters in the 60's. I thought "that's strange". How could he go from 20 to 60 quicker than a Ferrari. He had spent months with the 20's and seemed to make a few friends there. Rubbing shoulders with over 180 other articles, I thought he had done well for himself at low to mid 20.

So I watched him for a week but no, he wouldn't budge. One way or the other. So I smacked him with a frog. Not a big one, more of a light leap actually. I had brought him up better than that. I nurtured him from inception, to conception, and through maturity. I wasn't having any of it. He was too good to be hanging around the sixties. If I didn't step in, who knows, he may have even gone into 70's or 80's. And it absolutely would have broken my heart if he went to live in the three digit neighbourhood.

The frog worked and he soon saw the error of his ways. He started to make his way back up the chart. Except now he was not content with his twenty something home. No, he decided to go live at number 4. I'm so proud of my boy. I hope he will stay with the single digit crowd. They are so much more up market.

But now his brother has left the 20's to go hang out in the 50's without even saying hello to the 30's or 40's. He too has been there for over a week. I don't know if he will return to his top quarter neighbourhood of his own accord, or if he needs a smack as well to bring him back in line as one of the star players. I have looked at him and he's not a bad boy, he's just hanging out with the wrong crowd.

Some of my family is nothing short of an embarrassment to their father. I've tried to work them well, but they choose to run at the bottom of the pack. Just completely unruly and seem to take pride in being last. From time to time I think about hitting them so hard with a frog it would dangle their participle. But some were created on the spur of the moment and there was never any real passion between me and the keyboard. I look at them with disgust and wish they would just commit suicide. But Helium's healthcare plan just won't let them die.

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